


Low Places

by CaraRose



Series: Pro Forma Universe [2]
Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: And these two, But I answer it anyway, F/M, One Night Stand, Probably not., Sometime after the events in Pro Forma, What happens if FO and Resistance bump into each other on shore leave, but it's fun, ever ask that question?, in a bar on a neutral world?, maybe even beyond borderline, they're just so cute together, to be honest this fic is borderline cracky
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-13
Updated: 2018-08-03
Packaged: 2019-01-16 18:04:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 26,332
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12347811
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CaraRose/pseuds/CaraRose
Summary: Takes place some time after the events inPro Forma.On a neutral world, in a bar in the sketchy part of town, Kylo Ren and Rey once again cross paths.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I figured it was time to find my way back to these two again. This story takes place sometime after the events in Pro Forma.
> 
> Please note my Phasma in this story was developed in my head before the Phasma book came out, so she's probably exceptionally off character from what we know now in canon.

**_I used to think that this was my town, what a stupid thing to think_ **  
**_I see your fighting off a breakdown, I myself am on the brink_ **  
**_I used to want to be a real man, I don't know what that even means_ **  
**_I just want you in my arms again, and we can search each other's dreams_ **

 

 

The streets of Srario hadn’t changed much in the last ten years.

Rising with the side of the mountain, each street climbing ever upward, buildings tall and narrow lined the street, the some of the ones against the cliff face built into the rock. Loose rocks and cobblestones and dirt, people milling, bartering for illicit offerings- flesh, drugs, contraband. Suspicious glances.

He used to joke in his head that this was his town, back when he’d slip away from his uncle for a few days, claiming to be going to some peaceful, isolated place to meditate. Instead he’d come here and do all sorts of that were taboo to his Jedi teachings. Drink, revel, sometimes go to a street girl or two. More than once he found himself in a bar fight and came close to killing someone who had made the mistake of picking a fight with him.

His town, he laughed now at the thoughts of that lost boy. _His town_ , what a stupid thing to think.

It hadn’t really been his plan to be out here. He’d had to accompany Hux to a meeting with the Ibaarian local government. Ibaar was an asset the First Order wanted, but the planet had formed a small alliance with a few other nearby systems, making them wary of taking it by force. Diplomacy and intimidation were the next best option, so they had come here.

The discussion with the local authorities had not gone well. They proclaimed their neutrality, and for all of Hux’s bluster, they wouldn’t budge, not even with him looming menacingly behind the man, masked and threatening.

It hadn’t been too bad overall until Hux found out there was a Resistance presence on the planet at the moment that the government had no intention of doing anything about. And that if the First Order took any hostile actions against anyone visiting their planet legally, they would consider it an act of war.

Hux pretty much lost his shit. Which in normal circumstances he rather enjoyed seeing, but today he wasn’t in the mood for it, for any of it. As it was, he hadn’t been sleeping, his nerves rattled and his temper thin. When he did sleep, he dreamed of her, remembering the she’d looked at him with those wide hazel eyes and the way she had tasted and the way her bare skin had felt against his.

The memory of her haunted him, taunted him as it reminded him how badly he wanted her, how she was so far away, standing across from him with a chasm between them. A chasm made of opposing ideology and military aggression. He was on the narrow ledge atop the abyss and his frayed nerves were threatening to give way, and he would just snap, breakdown, lose himself to despair.

It wasn’t until they had been walking back to the command shuttle, Hux prattling on and ranting and raving, enraged after the meeting with the Ibaarians, that he decided he wasn’t going to be able to take the twenty minute ride back with the little prick. There were a few groups of First Order troops that had been allowed to come down for shore leave-- something Hux had been against allowing but Phasma had staunchly fought for and ultimately won-- and after weedling a recommendation for a cantina out of him, Phasma had offered a standing invitation for him to come join them when his duties were done.

He hadn’t planned on accepting, but given the alternative was listening to Hux… he’d shoved his mask into the redhead’s hands and told him he’d make his way to the Finalizer later, ignoring the indignant sputtering of the man as he walked away.

Being maskless normally made him feel vulnerable, but walking now streets on the seedier upper terraces of the city, town, whatever Sriaro qualified as, he felt just as anonymous as if his face had been hidden. He’d always found it amusing that in Sriaro the higher you rose in altitude the lower into the gutter you found yourself. But the benefit of these shadowed streets was the anonymity. Nobody here asked questions, nobody looked at anyone long enough in the face to ever really see them. It was safer that way.

The bar was still there. Not really a building as much as barrier with a door in front of the mouth of a cave with sign hanging lopsided from one hook with just the word “Drink” etched by hand on it, music faint but audible even with the door closed . He smirked to himself as he opened the door, the music echoing louder in his ears as he walked into the narrow cavern, wondering what Phasma had thought when she first saw where he’d suggested she go.

A long rough bar was built along the wall, mismatched stools lining it. The dim lighting from various randomly spaced light fixtures studding the wall opposite the bar. Nothing much had changed in the near decade since he’d been here. He was sure if he headed down and around the curve in the cave, he’d find the area where the cave widened into a full size room with it’s scattered tables occupied by travellers and local riffraff, tiny stage where the band was playing, all the same as the last time he’d been here. In the time since he’d last graced this bar it seemed as if everything had changed. The galaxy had shifted in violent and dangerous ways since then, cracking at the seams and falling apart. He had changed. The lost boy who had snuck away to revel in rebellion had seen his entire universe shatter and himself shatter with it. And in the aftermath he had pieced both back together into something rough and jagged, unable to ever go back to what it was before.

But this place, this nameless bar on the high streets of Sriaro, time seemed to have no power over. He almost expected to see a ghost, an echo, of who he was seated at the end of the bar, a bottle of Corellian whiskey in front of him.

Of course he didn’t find himself. But midway down the bar he caught sight of an imposing figure with blond hair and a small, squirrely looking man next to her. As he walked over she glanced over her shoulder, raising her eyebrows in surprise as she assessed him with piercing blue eyes.

“I must admit this wasn’t expected,” she said, speaking just loud enough that he could hear her over the music that echoed through the cave.

He shrugged, rapping his knuckles on the rough wooden bar to get the Snivvian bartender’s attention, “Corellian whiskey, a double.” The bartender gave a gruff nod and turned away, and he turned his attention back to Phasma, who was smirking at him.

“I was worried you might have sent us here as a joke when we found it.”

“You doubted me?” he gave a mock offended gasp, before straddling the stool next to her, leaning forward on the bar to peer at the mousey man next to her that was trying hard not to look towards him, “Having a good night, Mitaka?”

Brown eyes flicked at him, “Fine, sir,” Mitaka squeaked out before looking down at his cup and avoiding any eye contact.

Phasma rolled her eyes at him, “It’s… unique. But I must say they’re well stocked and the sound in here is incredible.” She held up her drink, swirling the brown liquid around the glass,“Very well stocked, do you know how hard it is to find Vaschean rye?”

He smirked, the bartender stomped over and slammed a glass down in front of him without any acknowledgement and grumbled to himself as he walked away.

“The employees are lovely too,” Phasma added, pleasantly, and he snorted into his whiskey before taking a sip. She scanned her eyes over him, “So was it either this or strangle Hux on the ride back?”

He chuckled, “More or less.”

“I was considering killing him if he continued to try to lecture me on how this place was below any member of the First Order and that leave down here shouldn’t be allowed.” She sipped her drink, “Seriously, he needs to see the medics about getting the stick in his ass removed.”

“For that prick it would require invasive surgery.”

From behind Phasma’s bulk he heard Mitaka snort into his drink and he leaned forward on the bar again to look around her to see the man again. The boards of the bar creaking under his elbows, “Do you have any opinions on the esteemed General you wish to share, Mitaka?”

Phasma turned her head and shot him an annoyed look, possibly bordering on a glare.

The man was mid-sip and he sputtered the liquor back into his glass, coughing, “No… I mean, yes, or no…” his eyes darted back and forth and Phasma sighed, putting her hand on her face. Mitaka glanced at her, opened and closed his mouth a few times, before seeming to find the one nerve that he had in his body and answering, voice diplomatic, “General Hux can be overbearing, I can not deny that. But one can not deny he also is an important man with a lot of pressure on him. So perhaps his overbearing nature is understandable.”

He rolled his eyes as Phasma shook her head at Mitaka almost endearingly. He leaned slightly closer to the smaller man, “Overbearing? Is that your code word for ‘intolerable asshole’?”

Mitaka muttered something and then stood, “I’m going to find the ‘fresher.”

“Go straight back and around the curve till the cave opens to the big room, then it’s to the left of the stage,” he said, leaning back again as Mitaka looked at him, a little startled at the level of detail, before turning and hurrying away from the two of them.

Phasma glanced at him, “I think you’re scaring my date.”

He shook his head, rolling his eyes slightly, “Of all people, Mitaka? That little mouse?”

“I find Dopheld kind of adorable,” she said, fondly. “And he’s not nearly as timid once you have him in the bedroom.”

“More detail than I need there,” he said, drolly, sipping his drink.

“Hmmm… on the subject of details, you even still remember how to get to the ‘fresher after how long since you’ve been here?”

“You never forget a ‘fresher after you spent half a night puking your guts out in it.”

“Okay, more details than needed,” she chuckled and he shrugged, a genuine smile tugging at the corners of his lips. Her eyes scanned him again, “If you’ll forgive me for the observation, Kylo, but you look like shit.”

He sighed, draining his drink and rapping his knuckles on the bar again, motioning to the bartender that he wanted another. “Not sleeping well, that’s all.”

Phasma opened her mouth, but whatever she was going to say was lost as the music cut off with a shrieking note and shouts and banging echoed from the main room. The two of them jumped to their feet, followed by two troopers who had been drinking further down the bar and another First Order officer who’d been sitting alone at the front end near the entrance. The five of them hurried down around the curve before pausing to take in the sight before them.

There were several tables flipped over, the band and most of the other patrons were watching the scene unfolding. A smaller half circle of people surrounded three men who had Mitaka pinned against the rock wall of the cavern. As he took another step forward, he realized he knew one of them.

The pilot. The fucking Resistance pilot. Who he could hear yelling slurred threats into Mitaka’s face as they got closer. The fucking _drunk_ Resistance pilot. His buddies appeared to be no more sober than he was, and the group of surrounding them-- more Resistance, he could only assume-- were in varying stages of sobriety, most of which leaning towards the “not very” end of the spectrum.

He strode forward. Whatever disdain he might have for Mitaka was meaningless right now. He was one of their people, and no one was going to touch one of their people and get away with it.

“Poe!”

A voice echoed through the cavern and his breath hitched in his throat. That voice. _Her_ voice. He stopped as the small figure worked her way from between people to step out into the open, looking utterly exasperated as she addressed the pilot, “What the hell do you think you’re doing? Let him go.”

The other four of his people stopped around him, and a voice called from the half circle of Resistance in contempt, “There’s fucking _more_ of them.”

Heads turned to look their way. She turned, looking flustered and frustrated and as if her nerves were frayed to the breaking point. Dark circles under her eyes told him that she hadn’t been sleeping well either.

Then she saw him, her hazel eyes, the same eyes that haunted his dreams, widening as their eyes met.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sleep had been elusive the last few months. Fitful nights tossing on her sleeping mat in her hut on Ahch-To. Nights pacing tiny quarters on Resistance ships or dingy motel rooms when Leia requested her help and Luke was willing to send her off. When she closed her eyes she saw his eyes looking up at her as he knelt before her in that room on Chandrila and spoke to her very soul.
> 
> It was wrong, so wrong. Within the ranks of the Resistance, Kylo Ren’s name was spoken in hushed tones, as if talking about him at all might be enough to lead him to them, saber crackling in hand as he rained down death. On Ahch-To, he was the living embodiment of Luke’s failures, an evil to be held up as what could happen if she strayed from the light. And if it wasn’t bad that she’d ended up in bed with him that night, now she spent her nights pining for him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Getting more or less to the same spot we left off last chapter, just from Rey's perspective.

**_I know you’re tired,_ **  
**_and you ain’t sleeping well,_ **  
**_Uninspired, likely mad as hell._ **

 

How did she get herself talked into this?

It was Poe and Jess’ fault, really. “Oh come on Rey, come you’re too stressed out, you got to let loose once in awhile. Come out with us.” Finn had at least had enough respect to back off after she politely declined the first time. Jess and Poe though, they wouldn’t relent, not until she agreed. So now here she was in this loud kriffing bar with a kriffing headache, nursing the same drink they bought her a few hours ago mostly so they wouldn’t keep trying to buy her another one.

Ibaar was mountainous and the city or town or whatever Srario was classified as was built terraced up a mountain side. The bar had taken advantage of this by building itself right into a long, narrow cave in the mountain, just fitting a false front and a door over the mouth of it. A rough bar was built along wall and the cave opened into a larger cavern around a bend, where tables and a stage were set up and a live band was playing.

She probably would have found the novelty of it intriguing under better circumstances. But for now her head just hurt and the cave made the sound of the music that much louder, and it made the rowdy and increasingly drunk group of Resistance pilots and fighters around her talk and laugh that much louder to be heard over the band.

Sleep had been elusive the last few months. Fitful nights tossing on her sleeping mat in her hut on Ahch-To. Nights pacing tiny quarters on Resistance ships or dingy motel rooms when Leia requested her help and Luke was willing to send her off. When she closed her eyes she saw his eyes looking up at her as he knelt before her in that room on Chandrila. Looking up at her as he spoke to her very soul.

It was wrong, so wrong. Within the ranks of the Resistance, Kylo Ren’s name was spoken in hushed tones, as if talking about him at all might be enough to lead him to them, saber crackling in hand as he rained down death. On Ahch-To, he was the living embodiment of Luke’s failures, an evil to be held up as what could happen if she strayed from the light. And if it wasn’t bad enough that she’d ended up in bed with him that night, now she spent her nights pining for him.

She was being pulled from all directions, from this longing for Kylo, from her friends in the Resistance that wanted her to come back and fight with them full time, from Luke and Leia that seemed to be in a constant tug of war over her, over the isolated training on that ocean in contrast to Leia’s need for a soldier who could wield the force for her cause and be held up as a figurehead, as proof of the Jedi rising once more. Since Luke wasn’t willing to do it, it now fell to her to fill that role.

A chair moved next to her and Finn sat down, she flicked her eyes at him and smiled.

“You really shouldn’t have let them pressure you into coming,” there was a slight sway to how he held himself, enough to tell her he wasn’t sober either. But gods knew he was a lot less drunk than anyone else in their group, other than her.

“It’s okay,” she answered as the band hit a high note that caused a particularly sharp throb of pain in her head.

“No, it’s not,” he leaned forward and put a hand onto the table as if he needed the contact to balance himself, “I mean they really were pushing cause how stressed you’d been, but Poe doesn’t get that what helps one guy relax just makes things worse for someone else. This--” he swayed as he leaned back, swinging his arm in an arc and nearly knocking a glass off the table, “this isn’t your type of scene.” He looked at her with a inebriated wide eyed earnestness and she couldn’t help but smile. Finn was still her first friend, the first person who ever looked at her with concern or kindness, and he remained both protective and caring. She loved him for that, she’d always love him for that.

He smiled back, “Probably could just go… you know. Most of them wouldn’t… well, I mean most of them are going to be lucky if they can find their way back to the hotel tonight. They won’t notice.”

Looking down she turned her drink between her palms. He was right, no one would probably know, but what if someone did? She was bad enough at all of this, more often than not she did her best at any of gatherings to find her way off in some spot alone, some corner of the room where she could isolate herself a bit. It might as well be the furthest corner of the world, surrounded by these people who were her friends and yet still completely alone. And then worse, was when she found herself being pulled into some conversation and she found her words failing her, some moment of aphasia where she can’t seem to figure out how to form her thoughts into words. Standing there horrified that she can’t seem to make herself answer whatever random small talk question someone had asked.

What in the world did these people really think about her when she acted like that? Did she come off cold? Awkward? Dumb? What would they think if someone noticed her running off by herself while they were all still out having a good time? Would they think she just didn’t want to be around them?

On Jakku nobody really gave a shit about her and it made it easier to not give a flying fuck what anyone thought about her. But here she wanted to be liked, she wanted acceptance and belonging. Sometimes she wondered what it was like being like Poe or Jess, people who seemed to thrive and energize in the company of others instead of like her who found it so exhausting.

“I might go in a little bit, but I’m fine now,” she gave him a smile that probably wasn’t convincing at all, but thankfully he seemed drunk enough that he didn’t notice. Instead he wrapped an arm around her and pulled her over against him, kissing her on top of her head.

“You’re my best girl…” Finn said, before having a long pause where he considered what he just said and thought it might have sounded off. “I mean, well, you know what I mean… I mean my bestest friend who’s also a girl.”

She laughed against him before moving to extract herself from one armed hug, “I get what you mean.” Standing she looked around the room, trying to figure out where the ‘fresher was in this place. “I’ll be back,” she said, raising her voice to be heard over the music, before setting off to try to find it, weaving in and out of the tables and nearly crashing into strangers moving about the room.

Finally she found the ladies room off to the right of the stage. It was a side chamber of the cave system, a small room with some stalls built along one wall and light fixtures that her scavenger instincts guessed had been salvaged from other random places studding the ceiling at inconsistent intervals. Across from the stalls, instead of a sink, water ran from wall of the cave, pooling in rock basins in a small fountain before cascading to a hand dug channel that funneled the water off to the far end of the room. The water pooled slightly as it appeared to drain through cracks in the floor.

Even with her head throbbing she had to stop and marvel at it. But she didn’t get to marvel long. Outside the ‘fresher she heard shouts and a bang, the music cutting off with a screeching note as another thud and more shouting.

Gods, what now?

Brushing her hand against her hip sack, where her lightsaber was stowed away, out of sight but there if she needed it, she reassured herself of its presence as she hurried out the ‘fresher and found herself met by a wall of people. The majority of the room had moved over to this side, watching as the group of Resistance were gathered around something in a half circle. She pushed her way through, noting the mess of knocked over chairs and a few tables that looked like they’d been flipped over. When she got to the group of Resistance, she pushed between them, trying to get to the front and see what they were watching.

“What’s going on?” she asked, crossly, as she elbowed a fighter pilot she didn’t really know out of her way. He glanced at her, words slurring as he spoke, “Found a fucking First Order kriff here an’ Dameron’s decided to say hi.”

First Order…her mind didn’t wrap around the words at first, the her eyes widened and she lowered her shoulder and shoved her way through. Ibaar was neutral territory, and if they wanted it to remain Resistance friendly then they couldn’t be starting fights, and they really couldn’t be starting fights with someone associated with the First Order. She got to the front of the half circle to see Dameron holding what appeared to be a small, squirrely-looking First Order officer against the wall, backed by two of the bigger Resistance guys behind him.

Her mind reeled. If they got the Resistance barred from Ibaar, Leia was going to fucking kill all of them. Not really sure what she was going to do, she snapped, voice cutting through the now quiet room, seeming to echo much louder than it should, “Poe!”

She stepped out from the circle, taking a deep breath. Nothing too serious had happened yet, it could be fixed. She could fix this before it got any further out of hand, “What the hell do you think you’re doing? Let him go.”

Poe looked back at her, eyes flashing and meeting her eyes. She stared at him, and his eyes flickered, which she hoped was a sign that some moment of logic was getting through the very thick wall of inebriation he appeared to be behind.

“There’s fucking _more_ of them.”

Her head snapped back towards the group. She didn’t know who had called out, voice full of contempt, but every other head was turning to look the other way now, and her own gaze followed.

Dark brown eyes met hers and her breath hitched, her own eyes widening.

Ren.

Oh shit.

Fucking Kylo Ren.

There were more people standing behind him, but for the moment all she could see was him. Around her the mob of Resistance began to grumble angrily as they turned towards the newcomers, and she knew she needed to do something, anything, to try to get people to stand down.

Instead she just stared into his eyes, and he stared back, mouth hanging slightly open in shock, features soft and seemingly awed at her presence.

“Son of a fucking bitch!” the voice and the body stepping next to her snapped her back to the current situation.

“Finn, back off,” she grabbed his arm, feeling a wave of panic.

Ren’s eyes narrowed as he looked at Finn before looking back at her, raising his eyebrows, then back at Finn once again, looking at the man as if he was a speck of dirt on his boots. Crossing his arms slowly and cocking his head, he spoke, voice droll, “Come now, that’s no way to talk about General Organa.”

A confused mutter passed through the group, not getting the joke, not aware that Kylo Ren was standing across the room from them. Even if they had known, only a third of these people probably knew who Ren’s parents were.

Behind Ren, a blond haired woman stood, blue eyes viciously sharp with anger. She spoke, softly, enunciating every letter with a soft and sinister hiss, “F. N. 2. 1. 8. 7.”

Finn blanched, brow furrowing in recognition and alarm, “Ph-phasma?”

The woman took a step forward, something entirely predatory in her step and utter rage in her eyes.

Rey took a deep breath, wondering if any chance of getting out of this without it turning into a full out brawl was going to be possible.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Opening lines are more lyrics from Jason Isbell's Hope The High Road.
> 
> Also, I once again have prose inspired by song lyrics worked into the chapter (BlackEyedLily found my little homage to Bruce Springsteen's Darkness on the Edge of Town last chapter ;) ). Probably not a band or a song most people know, so I'll just point them out here-- Rey's thoughts on being in the corner of the room and feeling like she might as well be in the farthest corner of the world, and then the idea of losing her voice in a moment of aphasia, those lines were inspired from the second verse of Deertick's Not So Dense: 
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> Have you ever felt the moment of aphasia?  
> Have you ever met your match at the apex?  
> Have you ever fallen down so hard everything shakes?  
> Have you ever been in the corner of the room and it feels like the farthest corner of the world?  
> Do you find it hard to be so sure?  
>  
> 
> Thank you all for the great feedback on the last chapter. I'm really excited to get back to this two.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Slowly, deliberately, he folded his arms across his chest, cocking his head before speaking in with a tone of dry humor, “Come now, that’s no way to talk about General Organa.”
> 
> The mob of Resistance muttered among themselves, not getting the joke. Likely because no one realized who was in the room with them.
> 
> Even though the audience that got it was limited, he still thought the joke was a good one. And judging from the flash of annoyance in Rey's eyes, she got it. She’d laugh about it later when the tension in the air wasn't so smothering, he was sure if it.
> 
> But right now, Rey was looking around with a panicked desperation in her eyes and he sighed inwardly, taking pity on her as she tried to figure out how to keep the peace and not let things continue to spiral out of control. It tugged at his heart in a way that only she seemed able to inspire, and he forgave her for her concern for the traitor. Forgave her for any and every trespass she’d committed and was still to commit.
> 
> Force, she had him. He was completely and irrevocably hers. He would forgive her for anything.

_**Last year was a son of a bitch**_  
_**for nearly everyone we know**_  
_**But I ain't fighting with you down in the ditch**_  
_**I'll meet you up here on the road.**_

 

It seemed like an eternity they just stared at each other, his mind blank and his mouth hanging slightly ajar, as if the muscles there had forgotten how to function. The rest of the room became distant-- out of focus. There was just Rey. She was all he could see, all his mind could comprehend at that moment.

Then an angry voice cut through the static in his brain and Rey whirled to catch the arm of the man who had stepped next to her. He registered the man she was touching before his brain caught up and supplied the words that had been spat out at him.

The traitor.

The fucking traitor.

And she was holding his arm, a look of near panic in her eyes that the man was going to get himself hurt.

That she concerned herself so much with _him_ lit his blood on fire. As if some errant stormtrooper was even worthy of her presence, much less her concern… or her _touch_.

For the first time he regretted not outright killing the man when he had the chance on Starkiller instead of leaving him to die slow, caring more about causing pain than actually seeing the man alive or dead. He hadn’t cared really, beyond wanting the man to suffer for managing to land that blow to his shoulder as they fought.

The protective fire in those hazel eyes warned him that if he touched the man now he’d never be forgiven. So he’d let it be, for now anyway.

Son of a fucking bitch? Was that what he had said? He looked from the traitor back to Rey, raising his eyebrows at her before looking back at the traitor in annoyed disgust.

Slowly, deliberately, he folded his arms across his chest, cocking his head before speaking in with a tone of dry humor, “Come now, that’s no way to talk about General Organa.”

The mob of Resistance muttered amongst themselves, not getting the joke. Likely because no one realized who was in the room with them.

Even though the audience that got it was limited, he still thought the joke was a good one. And judging from the flash of annoyance in Rey's eyes, _she_ got it. She’d laugh about it later when the tension in the air wasn't so smothering, he was sure if it.

But right now, Rey was looking around with a panicked desperation in her eyes and he sighed inwardly, taking pity on her as she tried to figure out how to keep the peace and not let things continue to spiral out of control. It tugged at his heart in a way that only she seemed able to inspire, and he forgave her for her concern for the traitor. Forgave her for any and every trespass she’d committed and was still to commit.

Force, she had him. He was completely and irrevocably hers. He would forgive her for anything.

Even as he calmed he became aware of the presence behind him, rage pulsing from her her in waves as she spoke, “F. N. 2. 1. 8. 7.”

Oh, yes, she would be upset, wouldn’t she? As Phasma stepped up next to him, blue eyes blazing and the traitor realized who she was, he suddenly envied Rey. She only had a mob of angry drunks to control.

He had to deal with Phasma.

A very pissed Phasma.

Almost cautiously he reached his hand out and grasped her shoulder, “Captain. Stand down.”

Her voice was nearly a hiss, spitting out the words slowly, “He. threw me. in. a. trash compactor.”

He kept his voice quiet, “Time and place, Phas.” She broke her gaze from the traitor and turned the full force of it on to him, angry and accusing for his sudden and uncharacteristic pacifism. Given a warning shake of his head and squeezing her shoulder, he paused and looked over the riff raff in front of him with disdain, “This is neutral territory. The First Order has enough respect of the Ibaarian government to not _instigate_ a fight and violate the neutrality of this place.”

Phasma gave him a glare that could have cut through transparisteel, “Considering they’ve already _attacked_ a First Order officer,I think they have already violated the neutrality.”

He let his eyes rest on Rey, noticing a look of relief that she wasn’t alone in trying to diffuse the situation. Though there was something else, something the way her eyes lingered on his hand where it touched Phasma’s shoulder, that made him think she might not be any happier seeing him touching another woman than he was seeing her touch another man.

Though maybe it was just him seeing a reflection of himself, something that wasn’t really there.

In any case, there was the little issue of Mitaka to deal with, because if they didn’t unhand him in the next few minutes the shit was going to hit the fan and he wasn’t going to stop it.

“I’m sure we can forgive this trespass, as long as Mitaka is unhanded _now_.” He looked pointedly at Rey.

She nodded, “Yes, Poe was about to do that, right Poe?” She turned to look at the pilot whose brow furrowed a moment before he took one staggering step towards her, his fingers still gripping the front of Mitaka’s jacket.

“We…” his voice slurred, “We don’t fucking answer to them, Rey.”

He rolled his eyes upward in irritation, marveling at the pilot’s ability to hold himself upright and form coherent if hard to make out sentences at his current level of intoxication. His hand caught Phasma’s shoulder again as she coiled up with tension.

“Poe,” Rey’s voice was calm. Calm and commanding. “You will release that man and allow him to walk away.”

_Very_ commanding, he shot his gaze to her in surprise. Had she really?

The pilot just blinked in confusion for a moment before repeating, “Right, I’ll let this man go…” his hand dropped away from Mitaka’s jacket, “an’ let him walk away.” The pilot stepped away.

Well, he supposed one wasn’t much more weak minded than when they were nearly black out drunk.

Mitaka stood frozen for a second, eyes darting between the pilot, the mob of Resistance, and then him. Rolling his eyes again he waved his hand to tell him to get his ass over to them before someone decided to pick up where the pilot had let off.

He scurried over, darting behind Phasma who looked at him with affectionate exasperation before returning her attention to the traitor with a stare that might have been able to obliterate star systems.

Really, given the level of rage, she was showing remarkable restraint. If he was that pissed this bar would be a flaming ruin by now.

Rey looked the pilot, opting to add one more command while the man was still pliable from her initial mind trick, “And you will go back to the hotel and sleep this off.”

‘Imma going back to the hotel now to sleep this off,” the man repeated, swaying as he staggered out of the bar. Several of his friends opting to trail out behind him.

A confused murmur grew through the mob, before someone shouted, “We’re not going to just let these sons of bitches go!”

He outwardly sighed this time and Rey rubbed a hand over her face before turning to face the crowd, “Would you all prefer to take on Kylo Ren? Because personally I think that might be a bad idea.”

Fuck. So much for anonymity. Maybe he’d be lucky and most of them would be too drunk to remember what he looked like.

It was hard to be irritated at her for outing him, given how well her tactic worked. The mob fell to dead silence, pulling back even a tiny bit. She had just told them the boogeyman was here, and they were freaking the fuck out.

Actually, it was a little satisfying, in its own way. His name and presence was enough to cow an angry mob. Maybe that was worth showing that he had a human face to a few drunks?

“That's Kylo Ren?” a voice called in a slightly hushed tone from the horde.

Rey turned and looked at the traitor, who looked back at her quizzically, at least until she jabbed her elbow into his ribs while mouthing what looked like _tell them_ at him.

“Yes, that’s Kylo Ren,” he said, loudly, rubbing his ribs and giving Rey a very annoyed look.

A fearful buzz rose from the crowd and Rey stepped forward again, “We are on neutral territory here. As long as we leave them alone, I’m sure they will leave us alone.”

“We start no quarrel that violates the peace here on Ibaar,” he assured.

“See, so go back to your tables… pick them up if you have to, and let’s forget this happened.”

The mob grumbled, but then began to disperse back throughout the cavern, picking up tables before sitting down. The rest of the crowd who had been watching this drama unfold began to return to their tables, and the band took the stage again.

As the music started to play he saw Rey grabbing the traitor’s arm, pulling him across the room to a table. He let his eyes linger on her as she she pushed the man down into a chair and sat down next to him, eyes scanning the room as if she expected someone to act up again at any time.

Finally he turned away glancing at the officer and two troopers that had accompanied them from the main bar, “I think things are settling, as you were.”

They nodded, wandering back towards the bar. He glanced at Phasma to find her pawing at Mitaka’s jacket gently and asking if he was alright.

“Can’t even handle getting yourself to the ‘fresher without an escort?” he asked.

Mitaka’s face went bright red and Phasma’s blue eyes snapped to him, “You stop, it’s not his fault.”

He could argue that point, but just raised his hands in a gesture of peace, letting it go.

“We’ll wait in here for you and make sure they don’t touch you,” she said, running a hand down Mitaka’s chest. The man mumbled something before warily walking off the direction of the ‘fresher, eying the room as if he was crossing a minefield.

“ _We_ will wait here?” he asked Phasma, raising his eyebrows.

Phasma jerked his arm and dragged him to a table in the corner, shoving him into a chair and dropping in one next to him, “Yes, _we_.”

“Am I doing penance for teasing Mitaka or for not letting you kill the traitor?” he asked, dryly before resting his chin on his hand and letting his eyes drift to where _she_ sat across the room.

“Maybe both,” she answered, and he could feel her eyes burning into him, but kept his gaze locked on Rey across the room as she continued, “you showed uncharacteristic restraint.”

He glanced back at Phasma to find her leaning back in her chair, arms folded across her chest. Shrugging he gave the only reasonable answers he had, “If this escalated we could get the First Order barred from Ibaar, ruin any chance of forming an alliance, and Hux’s head would fucking explode.”

She snorted, “Please, Kylo, you don’t give a flying fuck about Ibaar and the potential alliance here. And you live for seeing Hux’s head exploding.”

There wasn’t really any good response he could give to that. She was right, of course, if it had just been concern over the politics revolving around this one planet right now, this bar would have been the site of a bloodbath. A massacre of a level that it probably would go down in galactic history with some sort of ridiculous name like the 'Srario Cavern Slaughter' or some other bullshit like that. And Hux’s nervous breakdown afterwards would have been _amazing._ So he said, nothing, looking back to where Rey sat, brow furrowing as the fucking traitor put his hand on her shoulder and leaned in closer as he talked.

Phasma let out a fairly exaggerated sigh, “That’s her, isn’t it?”

He glanced back at Phasma meekly, giving a single nod before looking back to Rey again.

“It was a bad idea on Chandrila, Kylo.”

It was, and it was probably a bad idea now. But fuck it, he needed to find a way to see her. He needed to have her again, to feel her skin against his.

“I would have expected her to look less soft, given the damage she was able to deal you on Starkiller,” Phasma assessed, studying the girl across the room thoughtfully.

A smile played across his lips, “If a person thinks that girl anything other than durasteel under the surface they’re in for a surprise.”

“Oh, you _are_ in trouble, aren’t you?” He glanced at Phasma as she stood up, hand lightly squeezing his shoulder, “I’m going to the ladies ‘fresher, if anyone tries to manhandle my boyfriend before I get back, suck it up and intervene.”

Laughing once under his breath he nodded to the opposite side of the stage, “Ladies room to the right of the stage.”

“Thank you, now don’t go running off with any scavenger girls before I get back.”

He rolled his eyes at her before looking back to where the traitor appeared to be talking to Rey. A pang of jealousy gripped him again, a wave of possessiveness. Somehow he needed to talk to her, find a way to get her alone.

With no obvious way to do it now, he watched, and waited for an opportunity to open.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This variation of Kylo is certainly the most mature one I write. That said, he's still Kylo, so there's that possessiveness and jealousy still has to rear it's head in. 
> 
> Oh, and frankly Kylo mocking poor Mitaka was a low blow, Phasma's within her right to make you do a little penance for it by acting as "make sure Mitaka gets back from the bathroom safe" duty.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “You two seem friendly.” He seemed really amused by this-- was he laughing at her? It wasn’t until she noticed him looking at her mouth that she realized she was pouting, her lower lip sticking out as she glared at him. Gods, was she a five year old? Her face burned and she forced her lips straight.
> 
> Ren just shook his head, “We’re friends, kind of, in whatever way people like her and me can have friends.” He leaned towards her, “You were jealous.”
> 
> “I am… “ she sputtered a moment. That was ridiculous, “I am not jealous.”
> 
> “Is that so?” he gave her a patronizing smile.
> 
> “I ran into her in the ‘fresher,” she said, trying to reestablish her footing again as she glared accusingly,“I got the feeling she knew---”
> 
> “Oh…” he leaned back, looking slightly sheepish.
> 
> She put her face in her hands, shaking her head, “You _told_ her?”
> 
> “So…” he leaned forward, “here’s the thing with me and Phasma. I provide the whiskey, we bitch about work-- mainly Hux, mostly we bitch about Hux, and she listens and absolves me of my sins.”
> 
> She shook her head at the absurdity of this, “I’m a sin then?”
> 
> His eyes down from her face and back up again, “Best I ever committed.”

She scanned the room, leaning on the table, not quite believing it was over, that someone wasn't about to stir up trouble again. It helped that several of the drunkest ones had followed Poe after she had---  _ suggested--- _ he go back to the hotel and sleep it off.

Her scanning eyes caught sight of  _ that woman _ ... dragging Ren over to a table in the corner and shoving him into a chair. A pang of irritation flitted through her though she couldn’t say why it bothered her so much. Like when he had been touching the woman’s shoulder earlier and her eyes couldn’t seem to help but focus on that point of contact.

“Are you even listening to me?”

Finn... how long had he been talking? She turned to look at him, apparently the adrenaline had sobered him up a bit, he seemed a bit steadier, though sadly less happy. “Sorry, I missed that,” she apologized, trying to force her attention back to Finn and not let her eyes dart back across the room to find Ren.

“I said he’s got some nerve after what happened on Chandrila,” she froze, eyes widening, he… no one knew, how… “people saw him you know?”

A flush was creeping into her cheeks, and she felt near panic, “W-what are you talking about?”

“How he harassed you! People saw him following you around at the ball!”

She felt like every muscle in her body relaxed at once as she let out the breath she was holding, “Oh, that, yeah… um, it really wasn’t a big deal.” It was funny, she kind of looked back on his creepy stalking her around that room fondly. After the fact it just seemed… oh hell, she didn’t even know. He just seemed silly for doing it after everything else that happened that night.

“ _ Wasn’t _ a big deal?” Finn asked, incredulously. 

“It really wasn’t,” her eyes darted across the room to see the woman standing up and giving Ren’s shoulder a squeeze before walking away. Why the fuck would she touch him like that?

“Who was the blond?” she blurted out before she could stop herself. Realizing she was cutting off something Finn was saying that she wasn’t listening to as the words left her mouth.

Finn blinked at her, caught off guard by the sudden question, before answering, “Captain Phasma. I’ve never seen her out of armor. She was in charge of the stormtroopers on Starkiller.”

“She seemed really pissed at you,” she said, before realizing she was staring at Ren again and forced herself to look back at Finn.

“Yeah, so Chewie, Han, and I forced her to lower the shields,” she winced slightly at Han’s name, but Finn didn’t seem to notice, “we kind of threw her down a garbage chute. I think she might be upset about that.”

She cocked her head and raised her eyebrows, down a garbage chute? 

“It was Han’s idea,” he gave her a goofy grin and a shrug.

This time she managed not to wince, at least not outwardly. It was hard to reconcile thoughts of Han with… well, with how she felt about  _ him _ . For a second the room felt too crowded, too hot, her emotions too overwhelming. She needed a moment to herself. Pulling herself to her feet she nodded towards the ‘fresher, “I’m going to attempt to use the ‘fresher again. Hopefully without being interrupted by a bar brawl this time.”

“I’ll keep these hellions in line till you come back,” Finn winked at her.

She rolled her eyes, and gave him a “thanks” before making her way to the ‘fresher.

Once she entered the side chamber of the cave, she wandered over to the series of shallow basins that the water ran from the wall into. The water pooled and flowed in a way that the water was surprisingly smooth in how it pooled and overflowed the sides. Looking down into one, she could see her reflection shimmering in the surface, wincing at how strained and tired she looked. There were dark circles under her eyes from lack of sleep and she looked, just like she felt, that she might be on the edge a total and complete collapse under the strain of everything that had been flung on her shoulders.

But she couldn’t break down, not when she was the symbol of hope for the Resistance and the greater galaxy. The return once again of the Jedi… she wanted to laugh, it seemed so absurd. She was no one, just a scavenger from Jakku, how the fuck was she supposed to be--- supposed to--- to be whatever the hell it was she was supposed to be now?

Dipping her hands into the basin, she found the water startlingly cold. Picking up a handful she splashed water onto her face. It took her breath away for a second, but it felt good, cooling down her burning cheeks.

Behind her one of the stall doors opened, she glanced over her shoulder to meet a pair of startled blue eyes. She tensed in both alarm and surprise.

_ That woman _ .

Shit.

The blue eyes very quickly lost their surprise and took on a calculating look, scanning her slowly from head to toe and back up again. The scrutiny made her shift uncomfortably, heat creeping into her face again. 

“The little scavenger turned Jedi,” she intoned in a slightly imperious voice. 

A wave of annoyance hit her, and she glared upward at her, fists clenching, “My name is Rey.”

An amused smirk broke across the woman’s face, “So it is.” She stepped up next to her, washing her hands in one of the basins, and chuckled, “And you appear just as fiery as Ren said.”

She narrowed her eyes, “Ren said? Ren talked about me?”

Phasma gave her an amused sideways glance, raising her eyebrow, “Quite a bit. Especially once he gets half a bottle of Corellian whiskey into him. Then he babbles on and on and on.”

He talked about her. So he  _ thought  _ about her. He  _ thinks _ about her.

But…fuck, he talked about her when he was drunk? He didn’t… he wouldn’t have told anyone? That would have been admitting he slept with the enemy. The enemy who’d broken a First Order General’s nose that night. She blushed, no, no, he wouldn’t.

Except there was something strangely knowing in the way Phasma was looking at her.

“Try to stay out of trouble, Rey of Jakku,” she remarked before leaving.

Stay out of trouble? What was that supposed to mean? Did it mean like in a don’t get caught between a bunch of angry drunks trying to get into a bar brawl kind of way? Or a don’t break a first order officer’s nose kind of way? Or was it meant in a don’t fuck your enemy who apparently gets drunk and babbles, the stupid ass, this time kind of way?

Okay, she needed to calm down. This was just her imagination going wild. She started to walk out before she realized she still hadn’t actually used the bathroom and darted into one of the stalls to take care of that.

When she made her way back out to the main room, she saw Finn had gravitated to the larger group as a whole. That was fine, that was good. She really could use some time to herself. With a sigh she sat back down at the table she’d been at with Finn. It was off to the side of the room where things were less busy and less overwhelming. This was good, she could just stay here and monitor the remaining Resistance and make sure no one else caused any trouble and be by herself. 

She was scanning the room when movement next to her nearly made her jump out of her chair. Turning her head to look at who had just sat down next her, her eyes shot wide and an almost panicked babble came out of her mouth, “Oh no no no no no, this… no. no.”

Ren just looked highly amused, “What? This is neutral territory, remember? I can’t sit next to a girl in neutral territory?”

“Ren,” she warned with her tone. If anyone saw him near her, things could go bad again. Go bad again fast. Especially if there was gossip going around the ranks that he harassed her on Chandrila.

“Are you drinking?” he asked, ignoring her agitation.

“For fuck’s sake… Ren...”

“I’m guessing not, you’re not much for drinking, if I recall,” she felt her cheeks burn as he waved down a surly looking waitress making rounds about the room, “a double Corellian whiskey and a virgin Bespin Breeze.” The waitress gave a quizzical look before nodding and walking off.

“What--”

“It’s a non-alcoholic cocktail,” he explained, giving her a wink. “Probably the first time in the history of this bar anyone has asked for a virgin drink.”

“You have to go,” she said, trying her best to give a stern look. “If anyone notices you bothering me they’ll freak out.”

“Bothering you? How am I bothering you? I’m sitting and talking politely and buying a lovely girl a drink.” She pushed her face into her palms before peeking over her fingers to give him an exasperated look. He just smiled, “Just throw a couple more mind tricks at them if the mob starts to get unruly.”

“Yeah, they’re not all so drunk I can get away with that,” she glanced over the room warily. So far no one was looking this way. Thank the gods.

“It was brilliant.” He gazed at her with a look that can only be described as adoringly affectionate, letting his eyes linger on her before he finally spoke again, “I missed you.”

She blushed slightly, then frowned, leaning back and crossing her arms, studying him accusingly, “That woman you were with…”

“Woman I was with?” he asked, raising his eyebrows and sounding genuinely confused.

“The blond--”

He let out a laugh, “Phasma?”

“You two seem friendly.” He seemed really amused by this-- was he laughing at her? It wasn’t until she noticed him looking at her mouth that she realized she was pouting, her lower lip sticking out as she glared at him. Gods, was she a five year old? Her face burned and she forced her lips straight.

Ren just shook his head, “We’re friends, kind of, in whatever way people like her and me can have friends.” He leaned towards her, “You were jealous.”

“I am… “ she sputtered a moment. That was ridiculous, “I am not jealous.”

“Is that so?” he gave her a patronizing smile. 

“I ran into her in the ‘fresher,” she said, trying to reestablish her footing again as she glared accusingly, “I got the feeling she knew---”

“Oh…” he leaned back, looking slightly sheepish.

She put her face in her hands, shaking her head, “You  _ told  _ her?”

“So…” he leaned forward, “here’s the thing with me and Phasma. I provide the whiskey, we bitch about work-- mainly Hux, mostly we bitch about Hux, and she listens and absolves me of my sins.”

She shook her head at the absurdity of this, “I’m a sin then?”

His eyes scanned down from her face and back up again, “Best I ever committed.”

Okay, that line was awful, why was it making her blush to the tips of her ears? She shook her head again, not willing to let this go quite yet, “If she tells someone, won’t you get in trouble?”

Ren started to open his mouth and then the waitress came and slammed their drinks on the table before walking away. He picked up his drink and took a sip, “I’d be in world of pain from Snoke. Not that it wouldn’t have still been worth it, but yeah, he’d not going to be all to happy about that. And typically I’m not worried about Hux, but if he finds out I slept with you under his recently broken nose I think I’d need to test everything I consume for the rest of my life to make sure it wasn’t poisoned.”

She huffed, looking down at the drink in front of her uncertainly, “Then why--”

“Phasma’s good on secrets. Plus, I supply the good liquor… she’s not going to bite the hand that feeds her.” He paused to take a sip of his drink, “As it is, knowing we’re going to be able to get blitzed that night is the only thing that gets us through the four hours of Hux-meetings we have Zhelldays.” 

There didn’t seem to be any kind of response she could say to that, so she turned her focus down to look at the drink in front of her. 

“I-- I wasn’t-- I mean…” he flustered a moment, a bit of anxiety in his voice and his tone slightly pleading, “I hope you don’t think it was like I was bragging or anything. The details are hazy and all considering I was rather wasted but I’m pretty sure it was more of a lamenting babble of adoration and mourning.”

He looked almost desperate, as if the idea she might think something untoward about the type of person he is was the most horrible thing he could imagine. Which was absurd in its own way, considering everything else the man had done. 

But he looked so completely and utterly vulnerable right now, insecurity clear in his eyes. Kylo Ren, warrior of the First Order, was being undone at the thought that a girl might misjudge him.

She couldn't stop the small smile and bubble of laughter that rose from the ridiculousness of it. Smirking, she leaned back in her chair, still shaking a bit with laughter, “You are a dork.”

His brow furrowed, “Excuse me?”

“That’s your deep dark secret, I think I finally figured it out. Under the fierce warrior, and the suave debonair you like to play here, you are a complete and utter dork.” Before he could say anything else or look more offended, she reached over and put her hand over his much bigger one. His eyes immediately darted down and locked onto the point of contact. 

“I missed you too,” she said, softly, and his gaze immediately shot back to her face. 

He blinked at her slowly before a small smile spread across his face. She slipped her hand off of his, picking up the drink he’d bought her and looking at it, before taking a sip. It was an explosion of flavor on her tongue and blinked leaning back to stare at it, “Wow.”

Ren smiled, picking up his whiskey again.

“HEY!” they both jumped at the voice. Finn was striding over, looking furious. She glanced at the rest of the group and apparently no one else had noticed or hadn’t heard his shout over the band. 

“Finn!” she raised a hand up, “It’s not---”

He slammed his fists into the table in front of Ren, who for his part didn’t even flinch. Instead he casually lifted his whiskey and took a sip as Finn pointed a finger at him, “You’ve got some nerve you psychotic laser brained bastard.” Ren just stared nonchalantly over his cup as Finn continued to rant, “Harassing her here now after the way you stalked her and manhandled her on Chandrila.”

Ren raised an eyebrow, “I hardly think it qualified as stalking and I don’t recall manhandling anyone.”

“Oh really? People saw you drag her out of the room. Harassing her in the hall!”

Gods, how much gossip was there about Chandrila? And how was it no one seemed to see her punch Hux and everyone seemed to have seen Ren pulling her out of that ballroom? Or how could no one connect the two events that night together? As far as she knew, only Leia was aware that she had been the one who had decked the First Order general. 

_ That  _ had been a long shitty lecture about behavior. She’d hate to have thought about how much worse it would have been if the woman had found out the rest of what happened that night.

“Finn, calm down,” she began, pleadingly. Seriously, if this set everyone off again she might have to kill Finn.

“Calm down!? How the hell can you be asking me to calm down, Rey? I---”

A throat cleared, “Everything all right, Commander?” Finn immediately stiffened.

She rolled her eyes up at the woman now standing across from her, blue eyes fixed menacingly at Finn, before burying her face in her hands, “Shit.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, at least they got a few moments to themselves. ;)
> 
> Thank you all for the comments and kudos.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Oh really? People saw you drag her out of the room. Harassing her in the hall!”
> 
> That? That was manhandling? How about rescuing the silly girl before she got into more trouble, and before the dust could settle and anyone would know who had just knocked that First Order general onto his ass. He had protected her honor, that’s what he’d done, kept her from becoming the subject of Chandrilan gossip for the next few decades.
> 
> “Finn, calm down,” she pleaded. But there was an edge to her tone, a slight sharpness that told him she was getting frustrated and a little angry at the show her traitor friend was putting on.
> 
> “Calm down!? How the hell can you be asking me to calm down, Rey? I---”
> 
> A throat cleared, “Everything all right, Commander?”
> 
> Oh hell.
> 
> Phasma had her eyes fixed on Finn. A piercing look of a predator just waiting for prey to give it an opening to pounce and rip its throat out.
> 
> “Shit,” Rey mumbled as she buried her face into her hands.
> 
> Okay, his poor little girl. He’d take care of this… He looked up at Phasma’s intense, fixated expression.
> 
> _Maybe_ he’d be able to take care of this.

“You are a dork.”

He blinked… his brow furrowing, she had… she had just called him a  _ dork _ ? 

“Excuse me?”

She smirked, an amused glint in her eyes, “That’s your deep dark secret, I think I finally figured it out.” 

_ A dork _ ?

He could be called many things, many things that weren’t so nice, and would accept them. Monster, murderer, fine, okay, he could take that. From a certain point of view he could understand it. Arrogant? Well, fuck, he owned that one, he knew he was a cocky son of a bitch. But a dork? For gods sake, he had stopped being anything near dorky when he killed the awkward boy Ben Solo-Organa had been.

Rey’s eyes just twinkled as she continued, “Under the fierce warrior, and the suave debonair you like to play here, you are a complete and utter dork.”

Okay, so she thought he was fierce warrior, that was a plus. And she thought he was suave, or played suave whatever the fuck that meant, but despite that she still thought he was a dork? A complete and utter one no less? 

His mind raced to come up with something, anything, to say, but before he could her hand suddenly was resting on top of his. The feel of her warm skin against his was enough to make his heart leap into his throat and stop any thoughts that were running through his head at that moment. Darting his eyes down, he stared at her small hand sitting on top of his, his mouth hanging slightly open. 

Her next words were nearly missed under the static buzzing going through his head, and the soft, gentle, affectionate toe they were spoken in, “I missed you too.”

Looking up at her face, he just blinked a moment before starting to smile. She could call him a dork any time she wanted, that was fine. As long as she looked at him like she was looking at him now she could call him whatever she wanted.

Eventually, her hand slipped off his and he felt the loss of the contact down to his very soul. But she picked up the mock cocktail he’d gotten her and he waited with anticipation as she tried it, watching with delight as her eyes widened and she leaned back to stare in wonder at the drink, “Wow.”

He couldn’t help but smile as he picked up his whiskey. Flavorful and very sweet, yes that drink was exactly what his girl would like. It practically made him feel giddy to know she was enjoying what he bought her.

Fuck, maybe she was right, maybe he was a dork… at least when around her.

“HEY!” He jumped at the voice, cut through the din and the music. Looking up he saw the traitor, the fucking traitor again, striding over with angry purpose. Glancing a look at Rey he saw her scanning the rest of the Resistance rabble to be sure no one else had noticed the new commotion beginning. 

Rey raised a hand up, trying to pacify the irate ex-trooper, “Finn! It’s not---”

The traitor cut off whatever she was going to say by slamming his fists into the table directly in front of him.

Dramatic much? He casually lifted his glass and took a sip, his eyes resting on the man beginning to rant in front of him. 

“You’ve got some nerve you psychotic laser brained bastard.” 

Psychotic? He didn’t think so. Laser brained? Nope. He was a deep thinker, thank you. Bastard? His parents had been very much married at the time of his conception… Zero for three, traitor. He continued to look over his cup at the man, doing his best to keep a bored expression on his face.

“Harassing her here now after the way you stalked her and manhandled her on Chandrila.”

Stalking? Come on, he just trailed her around the party. Perhaps a  _ bit _ obsessively, but stalking? And he certainly didn’t manhandle her that night. He raised an eyebrow, “I hardly think it qualified as stalking and I don’t recall manhandling anyone.”

“Oh really? People saw you drag her out of the room. Harassing her in the hall!”

That? That was manhandling? How about rescuing the silly girl before she got into more trouble, and before the dust could settle and anyone would know who had just knocked that First Order general onto his ass. He had protected her honor, that’s what he’d done, kept her from becoming the subject of Chandrilan gossip for the next few decades.

“Finn, calm down,” she pleaded. But there was an edge to her tone, a slight sharpness that told him she was getting frustrated and a little angry at the show her traitor friend was putting on.

“Calm down!? How the hell can you be asking me to calm down, Rey? I---”

A throat cleared, “Everything all right, Commander?” 

Oh hell.

Phasma had her eyes fixed on Finn. A piercing look of a predator just waiting for prey to give it an opening to pounce and rip its throat out.

“Shit,” Rey mumbled as she buried her face into her hands. 

Okay, his poor little girl. He’d take care of this… He looked up at Phasma’s intense, fixated expression. 

_ Maybe _ he’d be able to take care of this.

“Everything’s fine, Captain. No need to bother here.”

Phasma continued to glower at the traitor, and he just returned the look, “Oh, this is no bother. I absolutely want to be here FN-2187 decides to escalate this and break the neutrality.”

The traitor spun, pointing a finger at Phasma, “Finn. My name’s Finn.” 

“Such a pity, you know? You had such potential,” she smirked coldly. “What a waste of what you could have been.”

The traitor, Finn, whatever he called himself now, was coiled like a spring ready to strike. And if that happened Phasma was more than ready for it. And if they really went at it, and the traitor for hurt or killed… he glanced at Rey who was clearly on edge, ready to come to her friend’s defense. Sighing inwardly, he cleared his throat, and Phasma glanced at him, “Don’t you need to get back to your boyfriend?”

Phasma narrowed her eyes, at him, “Oh, he’s fine, I think I want to be right here, just in case  _ Finn _ decides to step out of line.” She flicked her eyes to Rey, then him, as if challenging him to dare try to chase her from this just because he wanted to get laid.

“Step out of line? He’s the one who’s out of line,” Finn jabbed his finger towards Ren, “harassing here here just like he did on Chandrila.”

Rey slammed her hand onto table with a sudden ferocity, “He didn’t harass me on Chandrila, Finn. He helped me out by getting me out of that room and… and…” a hint of red tinted her cheeks, “... and telling me to go cool off.”

Phasma glanced Rey with a knowing smirk. He caught her eye as he gave a warning look. Fuck with him if she wanted, but not Rey.

“How the hell was he helping you by dragging you out---” the traitor sputtered.

“I made a scene,” Rey sounded embarrassed and utterly exasperated, “I got pissed and punched the First Order General at the bar.” Phasma straightened sharply her gaze shooting him questioningly as Rey continued, “And before anyone figured out I was the one who started everything he--” she nodded her head towards Ren, “pulled me out of the room…” Rey fumbled a minute, his girl wasn't used to lying, “And then told me in the hallway I needed to go somewhere and settle down.”

Phasma gestured at Rey, a dawning joy spreading across her face, “Wait… she…”

“Why the hell would he help you---” Finn said at the same time.

“She’s the one who broke Hux’s nose?” Phasma continued, completely ignoring Finn as she leaned across the table towards Ren, a look both accusing and delighted on her face, “ _ She _ was the one who broke Hux’s nose and  _ you didn’t bother telling me this detail _ ?” 

He shrugged meekly, mouthing the word sorry at Phasma.

“Do you have any idea how many Hux-meetings this little fact would have helped me get through?”

Rey looked away, her cheeks coloring again, “It was a stupid thing to do.”

Waving her hand dismissively, Phasma glanced at her, still looking highly amused, “Oh, I’m quite sure he deserved it.” Straightening, the woman smirked, “Next Zhellday I’m going to just stare at him through every one of those meetings as he drags them on and on and imagine that little girl knocking him on his ass.”

Rey huffed, “I am not a  _ little _ gi---”

“You know he added another two hour meeting before lunch?” She asked him in frustration, ignoring Rey's protest.

“Nope. Didn't get com I guess,” he leaned back, sipping his whiskey, “Shame  _ you never told me _ about it.”

Phasma snorted, “Seriously, Kylo?”

“I have actual  _ work _ to do. And you know he’s going to run that shit over into lunch. I know Hux considers lunch a nutrient drink and a stim pack, but I like eating actual food. And everything useful in those meetings could have been sent in a two paragraph com.” 

Finn and Rey were looking at them with confused expressions. He wondered if the Resistance didn't have meetings? If so, it was probably good they didn’t realize they could leverage that to get at least half of Hux’s upper command to defect.

“Anyway,” he glanced at Finn, “ to answer the why help question---” he spread his hands, “because her punching Hux was glorious, so I helped her.”

Rey glanced between him and Phasma, “Does  _ anyone _ like that guy?”

“No,” he said, Phasma’s voice joining his as they two answered in unison.

The traitor glanced around in confusion, as if he couldn’t quite grasp how this encounter had evolved, or perhaps devolved, then just shrugged, adding, “Every trooper who ever had to work with or around him  _ hated  _ him with a passion.” Finn shook his head, a quizzical grin growing on his face as he turned to Rey, “You broke Hux’s nose?”

“Yeah, I got an hour talk on the shuttle from Leia about how much I disappointed her with my behavior.”

He snorted, of course she did. Probably a mix of the I-expect-better-of-you and the did-you-bother-to-think-about-the-consequences-of-your-actions lectures together. Waving his hand dismissively, “Oh, you get used to those. I would get at least two a week growing up.”

Rey rolled her eyes at him before looking at Finn, “I’m fine, Finn, really.” She gave a small, almost shy smile, “Other than being tired, anyways. Do you think we might be able to start getting them,” she nodded towards the remaining Resistance rabble, “to get back to the hotel? Before someone does something else stupid?”

“Maybe,” the traitor glanced over his shoulder, “I can see what I can do anyway…” The man looked back at Rey, before turning to glower at him, “You sure you’re okay with  _ him _ here?” 

Seven different barbs jumped into his head, but he bit them back. It would do to not antagonize the traitor when it seemed like this was being diffused.

“Finn, I think I can handle myself,” she said with mild exasperation.

“Okay,” the man started to take a few steps back before pausing, “but if he starts to bother you---”

“Finn, seriously.”

“Okay, I’ll try to get the others to start going home,” Finn said before turning and heading over to the rest of the rabble.

Phasma let out a disappointed breath as her eyes followed the Finn as he walked away, “Fine, fine, till we meet in non-neutral territory,” she muttered.

“We should probably get our people out of here before any more trouble hits,” he suggested.

She gave an amused smirk, glancing at Rey again before looking at him, “I’ll tell the ranks to start heading back.” Quirking an eyebrow, a teasing lilt to her voice “I’m assuming you’ll be coming back with us tonight, Commander?”

He glanced at Rey, who gave him a warning shake of her head, clearly trying to dissuade him from his current line of thought. Glancing back at Phasma, he shrugged, “We’ll see.”

Phasma shook her head, “You’re an idiot, Kylo. A dear idiot, but still…” 

“He’s a dork,” Rey offered, getting a laugh out of the blond. 

Seriously now! He gave Rey a look, I mean fine if  _ she  _ wanted to call him a dork, but he had to keep some kind of dignity in front of Phasma. “I am not---” he began to protest, but Phasma just cut him off.

“I’ll check that Dopheld is still alright and then round up the rest to head back.” She nodded at Rey, “I like her, but stay out of trouble.” Starting to turn, she paused, a glint to her eye as she turned to Rey, “Oh, and Rey…” she went silent clearly mouthing the words “I know” as she nodded her head towards him.

“Hey!” he snapped at her. She shot him a smirk as she turned, weaving her way through the tables and people. He glared broodingly at her back until there was a brush of contact on his hand and he looked down to see Rey’s hand once again resting on top of his. 

Suddenly he was okay with being called a dork again. Yeah, yeah, fine, Rey could call him any name in front of anyone, that was fine.

“Where are you staying?” he blurted out.

She shook her head again, her cheeks coloring, “Ren, we can’t.”

“All I asked is where you’re staying?”

“Ren…”

“Kylo. Call me Kylo. Please,” there was an unfamiliar pleading to his voice. It made it sound alien to him, like someone else was speaking through him.

Rey gazed at him a moment, “We’re staying at a hotel one or two streets down. All of us, there’s like two floors full of Resistance,  _ Kylo _ .”

A small smile flitted across his face at her acquiescence at using his name. A few streets down, there was only one place big enough that close by… yes, just the sort of cheap dump the Resistance would put their people in, “The Keep?”

She blinked, a little surprised that he was able to pull up a name, “I… think so.”

“Do you have your own room?” 

For a long beat she just stared at him, shaking her head slightly before leaning back, “Yes… the jedi trainee gets the luxury of the only room that had one bed. It’s about the size of a closet, but it’s private at least.”

“308.”

Her brow furrowed as she blinked, a bit of concern and suspicion growing in her eyes, “How did you--”

“I know the room. It’s the cheapest room you can get there because of the size,” he added quickly. “I’ve stayed in it a few times… back in the day… um…” Shifting awkwardly, it occurred to him the last thing he wanted to do was talk about his wild nights he spent here in his youth. The last thing he wanted to bring up around her was his nights spent in drunken revelry, getting into fights, bringing random women, sometimes ones that he paid, back to that very room… 

“Are you blushing?” she asked suddenly, and he realized there was heat building in his cheeks. 

“Of course not,” he looked away. “It’s just warm in here.” A soft, affectionate smile was all he got in response to that weak denial. Taking a deep breath, he leaned towards her, his heart skipping in his chest, “If I find my way to that room tonight will you let me in?” 

He wasn’t sure he could take it if she told him no.

“Kylo, it’s not safe,” she stared at him, shaking her head, looking like the little lost girl that she was. 

Maybe, despite everything, he was still the lost boy that he thought he’d left behind. 

“Fuck safety,” he grumbled, his eyes flashing at hers intensely, “If I come will you let me in?”

She stared at him, stared too long. His heart pounding and blood rushing in his ears. The longer it took, the more panic started to grow. What if she said no? He wasn’t sure he could take it if she did. For a split second he closed his eyes, taking a breath and trying to get his frantic emotions back under some sort of control.

“Yes.”

His eyes snapped open to meet her hazel ones as he exhaled a breath. Staring into her eyes before reaching down and picking up her hand with both of his, leaning down to plant a soft kiss on her knuckles before standing.

“I’ll find a way then,” he murmured before turning and leaving to find Phasma and let her know he’d find his way back to the Finalizer tomorrow. The crowd was already thinning, some of the Resistance rabble having filtered their way out, making it easier to navigate through the room.

He could feel her eyes watching his back as he walked away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah, Kylo, you're proving you're an insecure dork right from the get go this chapter. 
> 
> I think I'm venting my aggravation with meetings into this story. Probably because I earn this award on a daily basis:
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> But anyway, I hope the aggravation with meetings humor isn't too weird for those who don't deal with the corporate world. The line about Hux's lunch being a nutrient drink and a stimpak actually comes from a line my coworker said about my old manager---who used to make meetings right before lunch and have them run over so you'd lose half your lunch hour--- that his idea of lunch was to drink an ensure and smoke a cigarette so he didn't get why it was an inconvenience to the rest of us.
> 
> So meeting babble aside, I think we've got these two heading for a nice little tryst, if Ren can find his way through an enemy filled hotel and find her room without being seen. Personally, I trust his ability to figure this shit out. ;)


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Her hand traced up, and followed the scar that started on his shoulder up his face. He stiffened slightly at that, eyes somehow darkening further as she cupped his cheek. She shook her head, a brief moment of sanity breaking through. She sighed,“What are we? In all of this, what can we be?”
> 
> Kylo blinked, his head tilting slightly for a long beat before he turned his head and kissed the palm that had been cupping his cheek, his lips quirking into a smile, “Enemies with benefits?”
> 
> She laughed, “You told me that night on Chandrila you weren’t my enemy.”
> 
> The smile fell away, his face becoming serious as he reached out and grabbed her, pulling her close, voice serious as he spoke, “I’m not. Really, Rey, I’m not.” He leaned down, giving her a soft, almost chaste kiss. Then she found herself heaved into the air, held tight in his arms as he walked over and set her gently on the bed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oooph, this chapter fought me. I haven't proofread it because I'm afraid I'll start getting wishy washy and want to start editing a lot. So instead I'm posting it first because once it's up I'll only do minor edits of rewording and grammar/spelling/typo fixes. 
> 
> Sometimes you need to know how to get around your own neuroses ;)
> 
> So, sorry for the delay, hope it's worth it, hope the smut flows, cause smut makes me awkwards, which is why this chapter fought me. *blows everyone a kiss*

By the time she followed the last of the last of their merry intoxicated group of revelers out onto the rough cobblestone street, the First Order was long gone, Ren nowhere in sight. 

Gods, what the hell had she been thinking? Why had she said yes? Ren really wasn’t crazy enough to try to sneak into a hotel filled with his enemies just to get to her, was he?

Yes, he was. That’s why she should have never had said yes.

The brisk night air felt good against her skin, which was feeling all too hot, her clothes too tight. Finn walked next to her as they followed the half dozen or so stragglers they had finally got to leave as they staggered down the street and managed to handle the switchback turn to the next street down without anyone falling. 

“So…”

She glanced at Finn warily as he continued, “What happened with Hux on Chandrila that got you mad enough to break his nose?”

Heat rose in her cheeks, both in the shame of the memory, of losing control and jeopardizing any potential alliance the Resistance might have been able to force with Chandrila, and at the memory of that slimy redheaded bastard’s voice.

“He’s an asshole,” she muttered.

“Yeah, I’m aware,” Finn grinned at her, “but you actually are pretty good at keeping your cool under pressure, Rey. I can only imagine he’d gone above and beyond normal asshole levels to set you off.”

Taking a breath, she glanced at Finn, “If I recall it was something about how when the First Order wins the war and executes everyone in the Resistance, I’d be spared because I’d make a fine little pet.” 

Finn’s eyes widened slightly in a look of revulsion that quickly shifted to anger, “You should have broken his neck.”

“I think I might have been considering it when I found myself dragged from the room,” she sighed, “I was standing over him seeing red.”

“Maybe Ren was protecting Hux and not trying to help you,” he offered, cautiously. “I mean, I’m not saying it didn’t help you out, but I wouldn’t trust his intent you know? It’s Kylo kriffing Ren. Maybe his intent wasn’t as noble as he made it out to be?”

Heat creeped up her cheeks again, because that wasn’t entirely far off. Ren’s intent when he pulled her out of that ballroom hadn’t just been to help her but also to get her into  _ his _ room that night. She suspected he’d just seen an opening, a way to get what he wanted, and had taken it when the opportunity struck.

Somehow she couldn’t find it in herself to hold that fact against him. 

“I don’t know what his intent was,” she shrugged. It wasn’t quite a lie, she really had never been a hundred percent certain if his intent was to get her into his bed or just to find a way to be alone with her. After all, she was the one who’d ended up starting  _ that _ part of that night. “But he did help me, and he’s been polite and civil with me in neutral territory, both here and when we were on Chandrila.”

“Just… I mean, don’t forget who you’re dealing with,” Finn gave her a wary look. “He nearly killed me on Starkiller.” 

She winced, that was a little detail that she was trying to compartmentalize right now. Along with---

“And he murdered Han,” Finn continued and she closed her eyes tight, seeing the flash of red bursting through the man’s back as she looked down from above.

**_“Do you regret killing your father?”_ **

She’d asked him that night, somewhat vindictively, while they played their game of questions. His face had gone blank as he stared at her coldly, and she had thought for a moment he wasn’t going to answer.

**_“Yes.”_ **

There was that, at least, that admission of regret. But then there was the question she’d followed it with, asking if he’d still do it again if he had the chance. And he’d rolled his shoulders and said “probably”. It was something she still couldn’t quite understand, how he could say he regretted it but also say he’d probably do it again if he could go back.

And she really didn’t want to think about any of that now. She could feel guilty later, regret things later.

Finn seemed to notice her prolonged silence and shifted uncomfortably, “Sorry, I shouldn’t have brought that up. It upsets you…”

“It’s fine,” she shook her head. “Don’t worry about it.”

“I’ll shut up now,” he added, wrapping his arm around her shoulder and pulling her against him in a hug. “You don’t need my babbling ass stressing you out more than this night already has.”

She smiled and pressed her head against his side. Finn was one of the few people who always made her smile, made her laugh, and she couldn’t even put into words how much she appreciated him for that.

The Keep was impressive in it’s size, if not much else. It ran along nearly half the length of the cliffside of the street, rising up three stories in mismatched, haphazard architecture that made it obvious where the building had been expanded over the years. The walls were made of old, weathered wood, heavily patched in places with new boards hammered over the old, and the roof was covered with thick, weathered wood shingles. 

They followed the rest of the party into the lobby, the rickety double doors squealing on the rusty hinges. Finn followed behind them to make sure everyone got to their correct room and help those that were past the ability to handle a lock and doorknob to get inside. She paused, turning to shut the doors.

“You appear strangely sober,” a voice spoke from across the room and she practically jumped out of her skin. She spun to see Lieutenant Tershin, one of the Resistance security officers, sitting on one of the old, worn lobby armchairs, his feet perched on an end table. He raised his eyebrows at her reaction, a small smirk on his face, “Didn’t think it was possible to surprise a Jedi.”

She rolled her eyes, “You’re just extra talented, I guess, Mika.”

He shrugged, “Been watching the ranks trickling back in, must of been a hell of a night given the state most of them were in. Surprised most of them were still walking and not crawling.”

“It was an exercise in excess,” she said, dryly.

She got a snort in response to that, and then his green eyes fell on her in a stare that made her feel self conscious, like she was being assessed in someway. Finally he spoke again, “But not for you?”

“Someone had to make sure we got them home in one piece,” she answered, flippantly. Tershin picked up a cup of caf and as she wondered why he was up and hanging around the lobby this time of night.

Before she could ask, Mika peered at her over the rim of his cup, “Is it a Jedi thing?” Her brow furrowed in confusion and he elaborated, “Not drinking. Forgive me for not buying the designated chaperone line, but I’m curious.”

She shook her head, “If it is, Luke didn’t bother telling me, I’m just not much of a drinker.” Squinting and cocking her head slightly, “What are you doing up this time of night?”

“Other than watching the drunks stumble home?” He smirked as she did an extra exaggerated eye roll, “Security watch. I’m on till five.”

Security watch? She blinked, that was… they hadn’t had a guard in the lobby for any of the last three days they’d been here. What the hell? 

Noticing her confusion, Mika nodded, “Yeah, it’s new. Turns out there’s a First Order presence on Ibaar as of today. Not really expecting them to start anything in neutral territory, but better safe than sorry.”

“Oh,” she said quietly, feeling her heart start to pound in something near panic. She took a breath, trying to calm down before Mika noticed anything odd about her. Ren wasn’t stupid, he wouldn’t just walk in with someone in the lobby. Maybe he’d recognize this whole thing was a bad idea and give up on it. Her heart sank at the thought, even as her mind insisted it would be for the best if that did happen.

She took a step back, “I’m going to go get some sleep… goodnight Lieutenant.”

He raised his cup, “Night, Rey.”

The staircase as she made her way to the third floor creaked and groaned under her feet. Unsurprisingly, the third floor hallway was deserted and silent aside from someone’s snores that were loud enough to make out through the thin walls. Room 308 was at the end of the hallway, somehow looking like the doorway had been added in as an afterthought, not fitting with the spacing of room doors around it. She pulled the key out of her pocket and entered the tiny room.

It was an odd shape, narrow at the doorway but flaring outward towards the far wall, as if someone had realized they had some extra space but had to be creative in how to partition it in a way that made it useable. Even at the widest point she didn’t think it was more than six paces across. A tiny ‘fresher was partitioned off not far from the entrance, nothing more than a toilet, sink, and claustrophobically small water shower, which might have been nice except the water never seemed to get more than lukewarm. There was a single chair, a table top that folded down from the wall on worn hinges, and a double bed tucked against the far corner with a small shelf jutting from the wall next to it instead of a nightstand. A single window broke the far wall, and since the room was on the cliffside, it actually gave a stunning view of the strange city as it sprawled its way down the mountain. She’d spent much of her first few days here looking out that window, alone with nothing much else to do.

She sat down on the bed, pulling her hair from the ties and letting it fall down over her shoulders. As she combed her fingers through it, working out the few tangles, she reminded herself it would be for the best if he didn’t come. Nothing good really would come from it in the long run. It had been a bad idea to even say yes.

The rational part of herself wasn’t doing much to convince the part of her that was still hopeful, or maybe desperate, or maybe both, that he’d find a way. That for tonight at least, she wouldn’t have to feel so alone. 

A sudden tapping broke her from her thoughts and she lept to her feet, turning towards the window where the noise was coming from, only to see a pair of brown eyes staring at her. Her mouth dropped open in disbelief and she stood frozen in place for a second before rushing over to open the window, the wood groaning angrily as it resisted her as she shoved the bottom pane up.

“Are you out of your mind?!” she hissed, leaning out just enough to get a good look down as she grabbed onto his shoulders. It was dizzying, not just the three stories of the building, but since the outerwall was built on the cliff’s edge, a fall would mean you’d end up on the roofs of the buildings on the next street down. 

Kylo hooked his leg over the window, squeezing his body through the gap before grabbing her and pulling her him in a sudden kiss as he still straddled the window. Whatever words were on her tongue to chastise him for doing something as idiotic as this melted away in the clash of lips and tongues. She pulled back after what felt like an eternity, needing to catch her breath, and as she did Kylo pitched forward, off balance, and fell the rest of the way into the room in an undignified crash into the floor. 

She stared down and him, taking a step back as a spat of giggles hit her. As much as she tried, she couldn’t seem to stop them, the utter absurdity of all of this overwhelmed her. There was a flash of embarrassed annoyance in Kylo’s eyes, but as she took another step back, sitting down on the edge of the bed as the giggles threatened to move into uncontrollable laughter, his eyes softened and the edges of his lips quirked upward. 

“Excuse the undignified entrance,” he said, pushing himself up on his elbows. “But there appeared to be a guard in the lobby, so sneaking in the front door seemed unwise.”

“You’re an idiot,” she gasped out between laughs.

He sat up, snorting, “I thought you established earlier that I’m a _ dork _ .”

Her side was beginning to hurt from laughing, she gasped another breath, doing her best to get herself back under control. “Oh, you’re also a dork, there’s no doubt about that. But you’re also an idiot, I can’t believe you climbed your way up here.”

Scooting over to her, he got on his knees, resting his hands on her thighs as he looked up at her with something she could only describe as adoration, a small smile on his lips, “I can either be a dork or an idiot, but you have to pick one or I will protest.” 

She giggled again and he grinned, his hand reaching up to brush his fingers against her cheek. Smirking, she leaned down so her face was close to his, “Sorry, you’re both.” 

The tiny gap between them shrunk further as he moved his face even closer, his lips a hair away from her own as he huffed, “I protest.”

Closing the nearly nonexistent gap she pressed her lips against his, leading a much softer iteration than the frantic clash of the kiss at the window. His hand reached up and threaded into her hair and she allowed herself to do the same, her hands twining through the soft black locks, letting the silky strands slide through her fingers.

Then she pulled away, breaking the kiss and somehow managing to let her hands pull away from his hair as she stood. “Too bad.”

He blinked up at her, confused, as she took a step away from him, “What…”

She nodded over her shoulder at the window, which was still open, “It’s letting cold air in.” Turning her back on him she walked over to the window. 

Behind her she heard Kylo climb to his feet, letting out an annoyed huff, “I’m very capable of keeping you warm.” 

With some effort, she forced the window closed again, turning to find he’d crossed few steps across the room to stand directly behind her, close enough that she had to tilt her head up now to look into his eyes, which smoldered with such intensity it that it seemed to swallow all the air around them. The corners of his lips twitched and he snatched her by the hips, pulling her up against him as he looked down. “If I’m a dork, you are a brat.”

“A brat?” she asked, her voice sounding strangely breathless.

His smile widened, “A brat. A mischievous little  _ brat _ .” The fingers on her hips tightened, pulling her even more firmly against his crotch and the evidence of his arousal straining against the fabric of his pants. 

She smiled and pulled on her bottom lip with her teeth, “Maybe.” His eyes had slipped down from her eyes to stare at her mouth as she played with her bottom lip, and they reluctantly broke away to look at her again,

“So, if I recall, I was your second,” he began, his fingers moving in gentle circles on her hips. Heat rose in her cheeks and she fought the urge to look down. His head tilted down closer, smile widening at her blush, “Your random spacer and then me. So this now---”

“Four,” she said, quietly. His brow furrowed a second and she smirked, “We went twice that night. So my drunken romp with the spacer, you, you, and now you.”

He grinned, “Brat.” His fingers slipped up under the edge of her tunic, and she raised her arms up as he pulled over her head. It was tossed unceremoniously to the ground and his hands immediately went to her bindings, fumbling for the tucked edge a moment before he found it and gently unwound them, his eyes darkening and breath quickening as her breasts were slowly exposed. A low rumble seemed to emanate from his chest as the bindings dropped to the floor, something low and deep and almost animalistic in a way that made her breath hitch in her chest.

Without any warning she found herself hoisted into the air, Kylo burying his face between her breasts as he stumbled the few steps forward to press her back against the wall. The impact made the old wood walls groan and creak, and even as she wrapped her legs around his waist she smacked his shoulder and hissed, “We need to be quiet.”

Kylo grunted, which may or may not have been meant to be a response, it was hard to tell. She was going to reiterate the point, the walls were ridiculously thin and the last thing she needed was whispers or rumours going around. But then his mouth enveloped her left nipple, suckling forcefully and she gasped, all thoughts purged from her mind at the sensation. Her legs tightened around his hips, her hips bucking against him to rub her crotch against the hardness there. When he turned his attention to the other breast she bit her bottom lip to stifle her moan.

He pulled away with a wet pop, and she chose that moment to tug his hair sharply, drawing his attention to her. 

“Quiet,” she said, intending to sound stern. Instead her voice came out as a wavering, breathless whisper. 

“Quiet, right,” he murmured, sounding very distracted, before capturing her mouth again.

That wasn’t the most convincing, but it was going to have to do. The throbbing between her legs and the haze settling over her mind meant she had zero willpower left to push the issue. As the broke apart again, she jerked at his tunic, unwrapping her legs from him so he’d set her down, “Off.”

He grinned, peeling off his layers, a task that took way too long, but it did give her a moment to catch her breath. As his undershirt was finally pulled over his head and tossed haphazardly behind him, she stalked forward, running a hand down the hard muscles of his chest before tracing along one of the scars that marked his abdomen, wondering briefly if it was one of the ones she gave him on Starkiller. 

As her hand wandered, Kylo stood stock still, almost seeming to hold his breath. She looked up to find his pupils dilated to the point that the black had nearly chased all the brown from them. It made her cunt clench and her breath quicken. 

Her hand traced up, and followed the scar that started on his shoulder up his face. He stiffened slightly at that, eyes somehow darkening further as she cupped his cheek. She shook her head, a brief moment of sanity breaking through. She sighed,“What are we? In all of this, what can we be?”

Kylo blinked, his head tilting slightly for a long beat before he turned his head and kissed the palm that had been cupping his cheek, his lips quirking into a smile, “Enemies with benefits?” 

She laughed, “You told me that night on Chandrila you weren’t my enemy.”

The smile fell away, his face becoming serious as he reached out and grabbed her, pulling her close, voice serious as he spoke, “I’m not. Really, Rey, I’m not.” He leaned down, giving her a soft, almost chaste kiss. Then she found herself heaved into the air, held tight in his arms as he walked over and set her gently on the bed.

He leaned down over her, setting one knee down on the edge of the bed as he hooked his fingers into the waistband of her pants and slid them down. Her breath hitched as her burning sex was exposed to the air, then again as Kylo straddled her, leaning over her in a way that dominated her perception so she couldn’t focus on anything other than him.

His hand came up, brushing hair from her face as he stared down at her with a mixture of lust and adoration, “You’re perfect.”

As flushed and burning as her skin already felt, it somehow was able to get even hotter as the flush in her cheeks deepened. He smiled, kissing her gently on the lips, before working his way downward in a trail of kisses, each building up more heat and more need. By the time he reached her thighs, planting a gentle kiss on each of them, she was desperate, a needy whine escaping her. She could feel his smile against her thigh, then his breath tickling against her core. 

She squirmed, and his hands reached up to hold her in place as he dipped down, tongue lapping across her in a broad stroke, causing her head to roll back against the headboard. He continued to work at her in torturously slow strokes, getting close but not quite to the spot she needed. Panting out soft moans that she fought to stifle, she wiggled her hips the tiny bit she could in his grasp, trying to get him closer to where she needed him, keening in frustration as he continued to avoid it.

When he paused, pressing a smirk against her thigh she realized he was doing it on purpose, teasing her like this. She jerked her hips hard in frustration, panting, “Stop playing with me…”

“Hmmmm? Sorry, am I being a  _ dork _ ?” he asked, a teasing lilt to his voice, and she immediately tried to box him in the ear with her knee. 

“You’re being an  _ ass _ ,” she growled.

He laughed, brushing his lips against her thigh before diving into her core again, another wide lap of his tongue, but this time he let it lead all the way up to her clit. He latched down on, suckling and lathing at it with his tongue, sending her rocketing towards the precipice.

She turned her head into the pillow as she came, trying her best to muffle her cries and swallow her screams. Pretty sure that she was doing a piss poor job of it, but she had to at least make an attempt.

As she came back to herself Kylo was hovering over her. She reached up, pulling him down into a gentle kiss before letting her hands slide down to fumble with the waistband of his pants. He sat up, reaching down to help divest him of his pants as fast as possible. She grasped his cock gently, stroking along its length, and Kylo shuddered under her touch, his head lolling back.

Letting go, she pulled him close again, kissing him as he brushed the head of his cock through her wetness. As he nudged her entrance he looked up, looking desperate with need but still silently asking for her permission, asking if she was ready.

She nodded. Gods, she needed this, she needed him more than she could ever explain in words.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More smut coming next chapter? Of course. And if you've noticed I'm swapping POV every other chapter, so next chapter we go back to Kylo for his POV of this fun night.
> 
> You all are awesome readers, bless all you who comment. Love you all.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It perhaps wasn’t his most dignified entrance, since he did wind up sprawled out on the floor when he fell into the room from the window. Maybe having a little patience and waiting until he actually was in the room and not straddling said window, one leg dangling over a very steep drop, to kiss her would have been beneficial… but it had been an eternity since he last tasted her. All common sense went out the window--- and presumably was smashed to bits on the roofs of the street the next terrace down--- the moment she was close enough for him to reach.
> 
> Still though, her laughing at him had seemed unnecessary, and his cheeks had reddened in embarrassment. For a split second he felt like the gawky, shy teenager he’d been, always saying and doing the wrong thing, especially when girls were involved. Always being laughed at.
> 
> Then she’d sat down on the bed, her giggling fit turning into near uncontrollable laughter, her eyes met his and there was no scorn or mocking in them, just affection. The building tension left him, and his smiled ever so slightly at his silly girl practically curling herself up as she tried to keep her laughing fit from getting too loud.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the wait, hope between the smut and banter this chapter makes up for it.

It perhaps wasn’t his most dignified entrance, since he did wind up sprawled out on the floor when he fell into the room from the window. Maybe having a little patience and waiting until he actually was in the room and not straddling said window, one leg dangling over a very steep drop, to kiss her would have been beneficial… but it had been an eternity since he last tasted her. All common sense went out the window--- and presumably was smashed to bits on the roofs of the street the next terrace down--- the moment she was close enough for him to reach.

Still though, her laughing at him had seemed unnecessary, and his cheeks had reddened in embarrassment. For a split second he felt like the gawky, shy teenager he’d been, always saying and doing the wrong thing, especially when girls were involved. Always being laughed at.

Then she’d sat down on the bed, her giggling fit turning into near uncontrollable laughter, her eyes met his and there was no scorn or mocking in them, just affection. The building tension left him, and his smiled ever so slightly at his silly girl practically curling herself up as she tried to keep her laughing fit from getting too loud.

Pushing himself up on his elbows, he kept his eyes on hers as she continued to laugh, “Excuse the undignified entrance, but there appeared to be a guard in the lobby, so sneaking in the front door seemed unwise.”

“You’re an idiot.”

No, no, she’d made it clear he was a dork, not an idiot. Snorting, he sat up, “I thought you established earlier that I’m a _dork_.”

“Oh, you’re also a dork, there’s no doubt about that,” she gasped for breath, trying to get herself back under control. With her face flushed and her chest hitching as she tried to catch her breath, she was such an enticingly lovely sight. “But you’re also an idiot, I can’t believe you climbed your way up here.”

He scooted himself over, which probably looked stupid as hell, him butt-scooting across the floor to get closer to her. Trying to rectify this, he got on his knees, which at least left him in a less dorky looking position as he rested his hands on her thighs and smiled up at her. “I can either be a dork or an idiot, but you have to pick one or I will protest.”

She giggled again, giggled at his words and not at him, and he grinned. As he brushed his fingers across her cheek she smirked, leaning down so her face was so temptingly close to his.

“Sorry, you’re both.”

Little brat, he moved his face closer, his lips just a breath away from hers, and huffed with exaggerated offense, “I protest.”

It was Rey who made the move to close the nearly nonexistent gap between them, her lips pressing against his and leading him into a softer, more gentler kiss than the near frantic one he’d given her at the window. Her hands were soon twining through his hair, and he realized that he was doing the same to hers. It was slightly coarse, just like her, and he didn’t mind that at all.

The she ripped herself away from him, her hands sliding from her hair as she stood up, “Too bad.”

‘Too bad’? What was too bad? Why… he blinked up at her as she walked away from him, “What…” his voice trailed off. Too bad he was protesting her calling him an idiot. That was what that was about. Maybe he was an idiot, that he hadn’t figured that out… but still, why was she pulling away from him?

Her eyes rolled and she tossed her head at the open window before turning her back to him, “It’s letting cold air in.”

He huffed in annoyance and clamoured to his feet, watching her as she fumbled with the old rickety window, “I’m very capable of keeping you warm.” Crossing the room as she forced the window closed, he was standing directly behind her when she turned, close enough that he had to crane his neck down, and she had to crane hers up, to look into each other’s eyes. The smallest smile crossed his face as he reached forward and grabbed her by the hips, pulling her flush against him as he stared into those beautiful eyes.

“If I’m a dork, you are a brat,” he told her.

“A brat?” she asked, her voice breathy and soft.

Oh yes, she was a brat, and a mischievous one at that. His little troublemaker, that’s what Rey was. “A brat. A mischievous little _brat_.” His cock was at full attention now, and he tightened his grip on her hips and pulled her flush against him, making sure she could feel him and evidence of what she was doing to him.

She smiled, biting her bottom lip with her teeth and then playing with it. “Maybe,” she said, but he barely heard it, his entire attention was now drawn to her lip, at how she rolled it between her teeth. The urge to kiss her again, kiss her and replace her teeth with his own and pull and scrape that plump little lip rose, and somehow he contained it, looking back up again at her eyes.

Massaging her hips with his fingertips, he drew a shaky breath before talking, “So, if I recall, I was your second,” her cheeks flushed and he smiled more broadly. There was always something so young and innocent about her. Leaning closer, he continued, “Your random spacer and then me. So this now---”

“Four.”

He blinked, a wave of confusion hitting him… had she… had there been someone else between? His heart seemed to sink at that thought, even though it was silly. They were on opposite sides of a war. Whatever this was between them was always going to be moments they could take advantage of, unless he could convince her to turn or she could convince him… neither of which was likely to happen. But… the thought of her with anyone else filled him with a potent, burning jealousy.

She smirked, “We went twice that night. So my drunken romp with the spacer, you, you, and now you.”

Relief washed over him, “Brat.” Oh, and she was… teasing him like that. Little bratty girl. He pulled her tunic up and she raised her arms to help him pull it over her head, dropping it to the ground as his eyes fixed on her bound breasts. He fumbled for the tucked edge, which seemed to take a frustratingly long time to find. Finally he found it and gently unwound them, her pert little breasts slowly exposed to him. His breath was coming quicker now, and low growl came unbidden from his throat. She gasped at the sound, and that gasp was too much for him to remain in any semblance of control. He grabbed her hoisting her into the air and burying his face between her breasts, staggering forward before stumbling into the wall with her. The walls groaned and creaked, but he barely heard them.

Rey must of been a little more aware, because she socked him hard in his shoulder as she wrapped those lovely long legs around his waist, hissing, “We need to be quiet.”

Fine, whatever, he grunted, the only response he was capable of at that moment, with their bodies pressed together and his face in her tits. He found her left nipple and enveloped it, sucking hard. Her breath grew ragged and her legs tightened, her hips grinding herself against the bulge in his pants. It urged him on, and he turned his attention to her other breast. Her sweet, beautiful breasts. Oh, he loved these. He really did.

Pulling away for just a moment, her fingers threaded into his hair and then grabbed and tugged with a sharp pull. He grunted again, but let his eyes meet hers.

She was trying to look stern, but her flushed face and heaving chest didn’t help her cause. Neither did the wavering, breathless whisper that came out when she tried to speak, “Quiet.”

Yes, right, quiet. No waking up the rest of the Resistance. Fine. “Quiet right,” he murmured before kissing her again. When he broke aware for air she unwrapped her legs from his waist, much to his disappointment. But then her hand tugged on his tunic, “Off.”

Oh, that did make him grin. He began to peel off his layers, wishing there had been time to change before taking his leave of Hux. Wearing this much made this a very slow process and slow was the last thing he wanted right now.

She stalked forward as he tossed his undershirt behind him, not paying any attention to where it went. Her little hands pressed against his bare chest, wandering gently. He stared at her, struck by the gentle fascination in her eyes as she moved her fingers along a scar. Then she looked up, and his breath caught as her hand moved upward, tracing the scar she had given him. He stiffened as she traced it up his neck and along his cheek. Then her hand cupped his cheek, and she sighed, “What are we? In all of this, what can we be?”

He tilted his head. That question was far too serious, far too depressing, to think of in this moment. Turning his head, he kissed her palm, smiling just slightly as he tried to break the rise in tension with levity, “Enemies with benefits?”

It worked, her eyes flashed in amusement, and she teased ever so slightly, “You told me that night on Chandrila you weren’t my enemy.”

All attempts at levity left him, and he pulled her close to him, eyes boring into hers as he spoke, “I’m not. Really, Rey, I’m not.” He brushed his lips against hers in a soft, gentle kiss, and then in one quick motion, swooped her into his arms. She was so soft, cradled in his arms, so light, yet everything about her was so overwhelmingly potent.

Setting her on the bed, bent over her, sliding her pants down, dropping them to the floor as he straddled her. Her breath hitched and her eyes burned into his, leaning down he brushed the hair from her face, desire mixing with affection. She was beautiful, the most beautiful thing he ever had seen, “You’re perfect.”

Her already red cheeks turned an even deeper crimson, and he smiled, capturing her mouth once more before working down her body, mouthing and kissing her flesh as he went. When he finally stopped between her thighs she let out a needy, almost desperate whine and he pressed his face against the firm muscles of her thigh, smiling, before dipping down and finally tasting her.

He worked at her slowly, leaving her panting and moaning as he lapped at her, a devious smirk on his face as he avoided her clit. She wiggled, frustrated, trying to get him closer to where she needed him, and he smirked as she keened, pausing a moment and once again nuzzling his face into her thigh.

She jerked her hips, realizing what he was doing, and panted angrily, “Stop playing with me…”

Grinning, he tilted his head up at her. She wasn’t the only one who could be a brat. “Hmmmm? Sorry, am I being a _dork_?” he teased.

The responding snarl might have been terrifying in other circumstances, and she swing her knee at his head, clearly hoping to box him once in revenge for this torment. His broad shoulders blocked her blow from making contact, and she growled, “You’re being an _ass_.”

Yes, yes he was. He laughed, brushing a kiss against her though before diving back down to her core, lapping her again, but this time letting it lead straight to her clit. He suckled and lathed at it, and it didn’t take long for her to come. She tried to muffle her screams with her pillow, and did a poor job of it. If there was anyone who wasn’t pass out drunk in the nearby rooms they were just treated to an earful.

He climbed back over her, and she blinked up at him, eyes still dazed as she came down from her orgasm. Her hand reached up, hooking around the back of his neck and pulling him to her for a kiss before her hands reached down to fumble at the fastenings of his pants. His eager little girl… he quickly moved to help, freeing himself and leaving his pants on a heap next to the bed. She grasped him, stroking gently, and he rolled his head back, shuddering.

Then her hand slipped away, pulling him close. He brushed himself through her folds, before nudging the head of his cock against her entrance, struggling to hold himself there as he looked at her to see if she was ready, to make sure…

A single nod was all he needed, he thrust in, probably too quickly, she gasped and her eyes fluttered closed for a second as he filled her. But then he was pulled tight to her again, their lips mashing together as he began to thrust. Her cunt seemed made for him, her walls gripping his dick so tight with every press forward. He pulled her legs up, hooking them over his shoulders to let him drive in even deeper, leaving her gasping under him, moaning his name in a way that drove him way to quickly towards his own release.

His hand slid down, thumb pressing down on her clit, hoping to bring her to completion before he lost control entirely. To his relief, she responded fast, her walls beginning to flutter almost instantly before clenching tight as she came. He gave a few more awkward thrusts and followed, groaning, spurting into her as her cunt milked him.

He collapsed on to his side, trying to avoid crushing her with his weight, and then nuzzled his face against her neck. Her arms wrapped around him and they stayed that way for a long while, sweat drying on their bodies, his eyes closed, content with the feeling of her warmth next to him and the scent of her in his nostrils. At some point her hand began to twine in his hair, stroking and petting, and he nuzzled her neck once more before opening his eyes, treated to her lovely face resting just inches from his. Her eyes were soft as she smiled at him.

“That went a bit quicker than I intended…” he murmured, feeling a bit self conscious at how quick he had come. At least he’d taken her with him.

Her eyes rolled, and she kissed him reassuringly. “You’re a silly man.”

“Must be a side effect of being a dork.”

She smiled, but there was a trace of sadness in her eyes as she continued to stroke his hair. He knew why. He felt it too.

“This is going to drive us insane. Since Chandrila, you know you were all I could think about,” her voice was soft. “Which made dealing with Luke really awkward.”

He groaned, “Please do not ruin this moment by mentioning my uncle right not.”

Her laugh was so musical, “Sorry.”

“Very high on things that can quickly ruin my afterglow.”

She rolled her eyes again, “Do I want to know the others?”

“Doesn’t matter cause I’m not thinking about them.”

“What are we going to do?” she sighed, and he just shook his head. She frowned, “You could defect.”

He snorted, yeah, there was no scenario where _that_ didn’t end with him on his knees and a blaster against the back of his head. “No.” She sighed, and he looked at her thoughtfully, “You could come with me.”

She pushed herself up on an elbow, “Not going to happen, and anyway, you expect me to believe Snoke would just welcome me to your fold?”

“Fuck Snoke, we can kill the son of a bitch, then take over the galaxy, you and me…” he said it jokingly, but in the back of his mind he couldn’t help but wonder… what if? Because together he thought they just might be able to pull it off.

“Rule the galaxy,” she said, sarcastically, “I can barely face a roomful of Resistance looking to me for leadership.”

“Oh, if you can control a mob of unruly drunks like you did tonight, the galaxy will be nothing…”

She snorted, starting to sit up. Uh uh, not going to happen… he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her down again, snuggling her against him.

“Little clingy?” she asked, pushing back a bit.

“Mine,” he said, kissing her forehead. She sighed and nuzzled herself against him, giving in. His eyes closed, feeling nothing but contentment with her in his arms.

Humming, she continued to cuddle up to him, “You really shouldn’t stay too long…”

“Hmmm…. Mmmmm….” she was right, but a little while longer. Just a little while longer, he sank into the contentment and peace of the moment, tired and drowsy…

 

* * *

 

He awoke to a hard knocking, blinking at the brightness of daylight spilling into the room from the window… wait… what…

“Hey Rey?” a voice called from the hallway. Rey sat up, her bare breasts bouncing with startled breaths. The knocking started again, “Rey?”

The traitor, he realized. That was the traitor’s voice. Hell, they must have fallen asleep… he looked around, trying to find all his scattered clothes across the room.

“SHIT.” Rey hissed, jumping out of bed and finding a shirt to put on. “Shit shit shit shit, you need to get out of here.”

“Rey? You up?” the traitor called again. He gritted his teeth, just figure she’s sleeping and fuck off he willed at the door.

“Yeah, just woke up…” Rey called, slightly frantically.

“Um… you okay? The rest of us are going to get breakfast.”

“Fine, just, I’ll meet up with you…” she pulled on her leggings, turning to glance at him to hurry the hell up and leave. He sat up grabbing his pants from where they lay heaped next to the bed, pulling them on and looking around for his undershirt.

There was a long pause, then the traitor spoke again, “Everything okay, Rey? You sound off…”

“I’m fine!” she snapped.

The door knob jiggled, but was thankfully locked, “Why’s your door locked?” He sounded suspicious. Why was a locked door suspicious?

She groaned, “Fuck, I never lock my door, Finn knows that…”

Wonderful, he rolled his eyes. She walked to the door, opening it just a crack to keep the traitor from being able to look in. Spotting his undershirt, he called it over to him with the force.

He really needed to get out of here.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heh, had to add some shit hitting the fan here... for purposes. ;)


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She sighed, shaking her head, “We’re leaving the day after tomorrow.”
> 
> His face fell ever so slightly, and she closed the gap between them to kiss him again. When they broke apart, she saw in his eyes the same pain she was feeling. Because she didn’t know how she was going back to her life without having him there. It was crazy. He was on the opposite side of this war, and she barely knew him and yet somehow felt she knew him better than anyone else she’d ever met. Closing her eyes, she took a step back and bit her lip, “Are you okay leaving the way you came in?”
> 
> The corners of his mouth twitched down ever so slightly and he turned away, walking to the window, “I’ll be fine, probably keep going down the cliff face to the street a terrace down.” The old, warped wood squealed and groaned as he forced the window up.
> 
> “Okay, but be careful,” she murmured.
> 
> He looked up, a tiny smile again as he sat on the window frame, “I will.” He threw his legs out and started to climb down, stopping when only his head was still visible. “Rey?”
> 
> She met his eyes and he spoke softly, “I love you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is lacking a good proofread cause I need to go to bed. I apologize for any grammar disasters.

“Hey Rey?” Finn… Oh shit, that was Finn, knocking. She sat up, glancing down at Kylo, who was blinking the sleep from his eyes. “Rey?” Finn began to knock again.

Oh… “SHIT!” she hissed, grabbing her shirt from the floor and pulling it over her head. “Shit shit shit shit, you need to get out of here.”

Kylo made a noise of assertion as he pushed himself up, bracing on his arms and looking around the room. Which she kind of wished he hadn’t done, because it drew her attention to his bare chest. His chiseled, beautiful chest. His absolutely perfect chest that she somewhat regretted not lathing her tongue over last night.

It was distracting her from finding her leggings, which was number one priority since Finn…

“Rey? You up?”

Yeah, Finn was still at the door and starting to sound a little concerned. Kylo’s teeth grated together… she could actually hear them grinding. She shot him a warning glance that she was pretty sure he missed as he tried to locate all his various layers of clothing that had been she last night. “Yeah, just woke up…” she called at the door, finally spotting her leggings on the floor and grabbing them.

“Um… you okay? The rest of us are going to get breakfast.”

Pulling on her leggings, she answered again, “Fine, just, I’ll meet up with you…” She turned again to Kylo, giving him a look that she hoped was communicating that this had been amazing and all and she really did hope they’d get to do it again soon but shit was going to go south in a hurry if he didn’t get the fuck out now. Apparently at least the get the fuck out part was clear because he found and started putting on his pants.

There was a long silence, but she knew Finn was still out there. She didn’t even need to use the force to sense him, he would have acknowledged her saying she’d catch up. Which meant that this quiet probably meant he was processing everything and overthinking it and getting worrie—

“Everything okay, Rey? You sound off…”

Yeah, yeah, getting worried. Damn it, couldn’t he be a shitty friend and not worry about her for once? “I’m fine!” she snapped.

The door knob jiggled, and her breath caught before she remembered locking it when she came into the room last night. Why had she done that? She hadn’t expected Kylo to come through the window, and part of her mind had been sure he wasn’t going to show… had she been hoping he would and wanted to be able to unlock it to show she really was keeping her word and opening the door for him like she said she would?

That would be a weird level of convoluted subconscious action. But the thing was she never locked her door. And while it was good that it was locked so Finn hadn’t walked in to see a half dressed Kylo sitting on her bed, the problem was…

“Why’s your door locked?” Finn called, voice now sounding worried and paranoid.

She groaned, “Fuck, I never lock my door, Finn knows that…”

Kylo let out a huff that sounded a little more annoyed than he had the right to sound right now. As she walked to the door, taking a breath and opening it a crack, she saw his undershirt fly to his hand. She peered at Finn through the crack, “Seriously, Finn, I can catch up with you guys, I just got up.”

Finn’s brow furrowed, “Are you alright?”

“Fine, I’m fine.” Aside from this whole nearly being caught with the enemy in her bed thing. Actually if that whole thing hadn’t happened she’d be more than fine. A lot more than fine. This could have been a really pleasant morning after, a lot better than on Chilandra when she had to scurry out of his room and dawn knowing she was going to have to answer to Leia and not knowing how much the woman knew.

“You’re acting strange.” Finn was on full alert, tense. About ready to kick the door the rest of the way open and come to her rescue from whatever danger might lurk in the closet sized room. What did he think? She was being held at blaster point or something? She was a Jedi, or at least a Jedi trainee, even if being Luke’s trainee had mainly taught her how much she hated meditation and how much green Thala-Siren milk grossed her the fuck out. Still, she had the force, she knew how to fight, she could take care of herself, damn it, Finn, you lovable ass.

She sighed, leaning her head on the doorframe, “Finn, I’m fine, just still groggy and tired from last night. I just want to take a shower before I go to breakfast.”

He bit his lower lip for a second and let out a breath, tension leaving his shoulders. “Okay, sorry, you just seemed to be acting a little off. I’ll—” A soft thud came from the room and Finn stiffened again. “What was that?”

Damn it, Kylo! Couldn’t he have managed to stay quiet for thirty more seconds? “What was what?”

“That noise.”

“Noise?” she asked, and Finn tilted his head up, eyes narrowing. She turned, making to fake look around like she was looking for the source of the noise that Finn had heard that she was claiming not to have heard. She blinked, startled, Kylo was nowhere in sight. The window was still closed, and that thing creaked and groaned like a bitch so there was no way he’d opened it anyway. So where…

Most of Kylo’s close were gone too, but she spotted his belt where it had been kicked to the side at some point last night. It flew suddenly across the room and vanished under the bed.

She blinked. Seriously?

The space under the bed seemed like it would be hard for her to fit. How the hell had he pulled that off?

Realizing she was taking too long on what was meant to be a glance around to convey there was nothing going on at all, she quickly looked back at Finn, “I didn’t hear it and I don’t see anything strange.”

“Rey…” Finn reached out and grabbed door, “is something going on?”

She rolled her eyes, “Seriously?” Throwing the door open, she motioned around the room, “Feel free to look around,” she said in an exasperated huff.

Finn frowned, scanning the room. She hoped he’d see the empty room, apologize, and just leave, but his trooper training was kicking in and he walked in. She huffed again, walking to the bed and sitting down, hopefully her presence there would keep Finn away from it. He paced the room, turning in a small circle before walking to the ‘fresher door and peering into the tiny room.

“I think that holds the record for galaxy’s smallest refresher,” she said, drolly, getting an amused glance from Finn. It also got a very faint snort from below the bed. She kicked her barefoot back under the bed, making contact with some part of Kylo, maybe a shoulder, in what she hoped would be a clear shut the fuck up message.

Coming back into the center of the room and seeming to study it for a second, Finn glanced at her and she raised her eyebrows. Her friend exhaled, tension leaving him again, “Okay, so I guess it’s not like someone has a place to hide in here.”

“Finn…” she smiled at him affectionately, “Who would I be hiding from you in my room?”

“I—” he sighed, “Okay, I guess this was silly of me.”

“I mean, do you think I have Kylo Ren hidden in here or something?” Finn laughed, which was good because it hid the faint amused huff from under the bed. She kicked back again, but instead of making impact she felt a hand close around her toes.

“Okay, sorry, you just…” Finn shrugged, smiling sheepishly. She tried to jerk her foot out from Kylo’s grip on it under the bed without it looking weird, but he didn’t let go. “You weren’t acting like yourself at all and it got me worried.”

“I’m just tired, I’ve—” her eyes widened and her breath hitched as she felt a pair of lips press against her foot that was being held hostage under the bed, suckling lightly right above her toes. Trying to keep her voice from raising in pitch, she continued, “I’ve just…. Just been tired lately. And stressed. There’s a lot of pressure from Leia and Luke…” Kylo nipped at her foot and she nearly squeaked, “Lots of pressure you know and I’m just nobody and its kind of overwhelming.”

“Hell, Rey…” Finn walked towards her, holding his hands out. Under the bed Kylo now was starting to suck on her toes which was both weird and surprisingly arousing and she was going to fucking kill him once Finn was out of here. “You’re not nobody,” Finn continued. “You’re amazing. Even without the force you’re amazing. You’re strong and talented and can do just about anything.”

“I love you, Finn…” she started, taking Finn’s hands in hers. Kylo suddenly bit her toes she nearly squeaked again. Had her saying she loved Finn annoyed him? Well, fuck him if it did. He soothed where he’d bit her with his tongue and she breathed a shaky breath. Why was this so hot? Hell, maybe she was going to fuck him, like, literally. Once Finn was finally gone. Fuck him and _then_ kill him. “You’re a wonderful friend,” she finished, smiling sweetly.

Finn pulled her hands up and kissed them before letting them go, “Okay, we’re going to that hole in the wall…” He snorted, she rolled her eyes, knowing the place he was talking about. It was tiny and literally a hole in the cliff face, “the one down the street.”

“Okay, tell everyone I’ll be there in maybe a half hour?” She squeezed her thighs together. Kylo was sucking her toes again. Watching walk out she gripped the bed sheets and twisted them, waiting until the door click shut to wrench her foot out from his grip hard and jump to her feet, turning to face the bed with a hiss. “Seriously, Kylo?”

An amused snort came from under the bed and it tilted up a few inches, Kylo shimmying out of the narrow gap. “You have a really pretty foot…” he murmured, smiling mischievously as he knocked clumps of dust from off his shirt. His black pants were grey with dust in places, and a clump of dust hung was in his hair. She walked over as he stood up and brushed off his pants, straightening as she neared.

“Yeah, well, you’re lucky Finn didn’t push why I was acting weird.” She reached up and raked her fingers through his silky black locks, pulling the dust clump from it. “Plus,” she pushed him back a step, palm flat on his chest, “you got me all worked up and we don’t have time to take care of it. Dork.”

He blinked at her, surprised, “Oh… I… I didn’t realize you were that into that…”

She blushed, “Yeah, neither did I.”

“We could try for a speed record?” he grinned hopefully. She folded her arms, looking at him with was what she hoped was a stern expression. He sighed, “Okay, okay. Guess not.”

“No reward for bad behavior,” she said, smirking. “You’re leaving and I’m going to take a cold shower.”

He fake pouted, and she grabbed his shirt and pulled him in for a kiss. When they broke apart, he smirked, “Mental note that my little brat likes to have her toes sucked.” She felt her face heat up and he grinned a moment before his smile fell away and he looked down at her seriously. “How long are you here? We’re probably not leaving the system for another week, unless something happens. I might be able to get down here again in a few days?” His voice was heartbreakingly hopeful.

She sighed, shaking her head, “We’re leaving the day after tomorrow.”

His face fell ever so slightly, and she closed the gap between them to kiss him again. When they broke apart, she saw in his eyes the same pain she was feeling. Because she didn’t know how she was going back to her life without having him there. It was crazy. He was on the opposite side of this war, and she barely knew him and yet somehow felt she knew him better than anyone else she’d ever met. Closing her eyes, she took a step back and bit her lip, “Are you okay leaving the way you came in?”

The corners of his mouth twitched down ever so slightly and he turned away, walking to the window, “I’ll be fine, probably keep going down the cliff face to the street a terrace down.” The old, warped wood squealed and groaned as he forced the window up.

“Okay, but be careful,” she murmured.

He looked up, a tiny smile again as he sat on the window frame, “I will.” He threw his legs out and started to climb down, stopping when only his head was still visible. “Rey?”

She met his eyes and he spoke softly, “I love you.”

Her mouth dropped open slightly as she stared at him numbly. At her reaction he smiled, and then vanished below the window frame. She stared where he had been for another few minutes before turning hurrying into the ‘fresher, turning the water on cold and jumping under the spray until she started to shiver before turning the temperature dial back to hot, not that the water ever got hot. The tepid, lukewarm stream actually felt pleasant though after the cold blast she’d given herself.

When she was done, she stepped out of the tiny shower stall back into the galaxy’s smallest ‘fresher and grabbed one of the rough, dingy white towels from the rack, drying herself off and wondering what kind of emotional mess she’d managed to get herself into.

 

* * *

 

There were about ten people in the group of Resistance sitting at the ramshackle tables along the street by the little nook of a eatery. Marix HotCakes, as the hand painted basic above the alcove in the cliff wall labeled it, was a small nook with a griddle and a surly, not so sanitary looking human manning said griddle. There was one thing on the menu, which didn’t matter because that one thing was cheap and amazingly good. For five credits, you would be served five hot cakes Corellian style, three links of happabore sausage, and caf with free refills. As long as you didn’t bother looking at the cook or the filthy, grease coated stove or wonder in any way about sanitation, you’d be treated to one of the best breakfasts of your life.

The hot cakes were amazing, slathered in bantha butter and carbosyrup. She didn’t actually have any basis for comparison, they were the first hot cakes she’d ever eaten, but most of the others claimed they were the best they’d ever had. The happabore sausage was fried and salty and greasy. The caf might have been the best she’d ever drank. She easily could eat two or three orders from this place, and was pretty sure she might do that this morning.

Finn had saved her a seat beside him, a slightly green looking Poe and rather listless Pava sat across from them. Poe seemed unfazed by her, so either he didn’t hold her breaking up the bar fight last night against her, or more likely, didn’t remember any of it. There was aimless chatter around the tables.

For the most part, she ignored the conversations, focusing on shoveling the food into her face and trying not to actually groan with pleasure out loud.

“Got to say, isn’t much to be happy about staying longer, but maybe these hot cakes are one of them…” Poe said, gruffly, before downing the rest of his caf and refilling the cup.

She looked up sharply, “Wait, what?”

“What what?” Poe asked, picking his caf up and holding it against his chin with his eyes closed.

“About staying longer? I thought we leave day after tomorrow?”

“Change of plans… cause of the First Order presence here right now,” Poe set his caf down and took a breath. “Fuck my head is pounding.”

“What’s the change of plan?” she asked sharply, causing Poe and Pava and a few others to flinch.

“Keep it down, will you?” Poe sighed, “So yeah, orders came down last night. Just found out about it this morning. We’re staying at least another week… and the General is coming.”

She blinked… the General… was coming? “Le-Leia is coming? How is that not a bad idea?!”

“She’s going to talk to the Ibaarians about siding with us and banning First Order from this system.”

“But why? They made it clear to us that they don’t intend to break their neutrality?” She shook her head, “And it isn’t safe at all for her, not with the First Order presence here!”

“I think that’s the point,” Finn said, slowly. “I don’t like it, but I think she’s putting herself here as bait to try to get the First Order to act badly and force the Ibaarians’ hand.”

Her heart sank, this was going to be trouble. Leia was putting herself in danger, and she was still going to be here and Kylo was going to still be here and it was going to be far too dangerous for them to even think about seeing each other again.

The thought of leaving and being apart was terrible. But the idea of being close and not being able to find a way to be together was somehow much much worse.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One chapter left after this so we can visit with Kylo again, but I'm setting up for a sequel to be written in the future.
> 
> Kylo dropped the L bomb first. He was happy enough with Rey's stunned reaction that it didn't even bother him she didn't say it back.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dangling his feet out the window, he hung for a moment until he found toeholds on the edges of the old wooden shingles that sided the outer walls of the hotel. When he was secure he began to climb down, but felt compelled to stop once while she was still in sight.
> 
> “Rey?” He wasn't sure what to say, but the urge, the need, to say… something… was overwhelming.
> 
> She looked up, those lovely hazel eyes staring into his. His mouth went dry and he heard the words tumble out of his mouth, “I love you.”
> 
> Oh shit. Did he really just say that?
> 
> Before he could start mentally cursing himself for uttering three words that were probably going to send her running from him, her eyes widened. And not in a “oh my gods he’s getting all clingy” sort of way. No, it was more of a “if you were still in this room I’d totally fuck you again” sort of way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahhh, last chapter. This ends on a bit of a cliffhanger, which will be resolved in the next installment of this series. Not sure when I'm going to be writing the next one, but I promise that it will be written. 
> 
> This chapter is a little bit cracky, just a bit. Hope it works for you all.

“Are you okay leaving the way you came in?”

Even knowing that it was coming didn't hurt the sting of Rey asking him to leave, the disappointment of it. It felt like rejection, even as the logical, sane part of his mind insisted it was just her being sensible. He shouldn't have stayed this long and there were already one too many close calls.

So he turned away, heading back to the window, “I’ll be fine, probably keep going down the cliff face to the street a terrace down.” He forced the window up, the wood squealing angrily in the frame.

“Okay, but be careful,” her voice floated softly, musically, from behind him. That single sentence was strangely soothing to his jumbled emotions. She was worried about him. She cared about him.

“I will,” he answered, giving her a tiny smile as he sat down on the window frame. Dangling his feet out the window, he hung for a moment until he found toeholds on the edges of the old wooden shingles that sided the outer walls of the hotel. When he was secure he began to climb down, but felt compelled to stop once while she was still in sight.

“Rey?” He wasn't sure what to say, but the urge, the need, to say… something… was overwhelming.

She looked up, those lovely hazel eyes staring into his. His mouth went dry and he heard the words tumble out of his mouth, “I love you.”

Oh shit. Did he really just say that?

Before he could start mentally cursing himself for uttering three words that were probably going to send her running from him, her eyes widened. And not in a “oh my gods he’s getting all clingy” sort of way. No, it was more of a “if you were still in this room I’d totally fuck you again” sort of way.

He smiled at her one last time before starting to climb down, carefully choosing his hand and footholds. The shingles were old and rotted out in places, and it was a long enough fall to the street a level below that he wasn’t sure the force would be able to help him if he fell. Not that it wouldn’t have still been worth it, but he’d much prefer dying in a bit warrior like fashion. Legacy and reputation and all that.

Once he reached the bottom of the building, he carefully transitioned to the cliff face the Keep skirted the edge of, working his way down until he could jump down to the roof of a building on the next street down. From there it was easy to jump his way across the roofs until he was able to find a path down to the street below. He jumped down from a low awning, landing in a crouch and startling the old shopkeeper who’d been sweeping out the doorway of his shop.

The old man yelped and stumbled several steps back. He motioned apologetically as he stood, pausing to brush the dust from his pants, ignoring the barrage of what he assumed were curses being spat at him by the shopkeeper in Snivvian. Apparently the apology was not being well accepted.

Another time or place and he might have gotten annoyed, might have decided to scare some respect into the shopkeep. But not today, not when, despite the hollow sadness and longing that were coming from leaving, he was feeling sated and content. He was in a pretty fucking good mood, actually, and he hadn't felt good in a very long time.

So he shrugged and smiled at the old man, still swearing at him in Snivvian, with a few garbled Basic insults also being peppered in. Offering a mock salute, he turned and headed down the street, ignoring the suspicious looks he got from the people out starting their day.

There would be taxis, at least once he got a little lower into the more respectable streets of the city, but he decided he would walk his way to the glitzy low streets where he could call for a shuttle to come get him. The sun was shining pleasantly and a nice breeze was blowing. Exercise would be good for clearing his head.

And besides, he really had a few stops to make on the way down.

 

* * *

 

He had held out hope of avoiding Hux, at least for awhile, upon his return to the Finalizer. The nosy bastard was going to want to know why he didn't return with the rest of the crew yesterday, and it would be nice to have a little more time to make something believable up.

That hope had shriveled and died the moment he stepped down the shuttle ramp to find Hux’s blue eyes glaring at him from six feet away.

“General,” he nodded, trying to keep emotion from his face and voice. The last thing he needed was Hux to pick up on of the anxiety he was feeling. His eyes drifted down to his mask in Hux’s hands— fuck, he had passed it off on the general before heading off to meet Phasma at the bar, hadn’t he?

He could use that mask right now to hide any stray emotions Hux could pick up on. Plus it unsettled the fuck out of that prick, which always gave him a great deal of satisfaction. But snatching it out of the redhead’s hands and shoving it on would probably make it kind of obvious that he was insecure about something.

“Explain yourself!” Hux snapped.

He raised his eyebrows. Technically his superior or not, that was just rude. Sometimes Hux needed reminding about the whole technicality of the chain of command between the two of them. Perhaps another reminder was going to be needed. He crossed his arms, “ _Explain myself_?”

Hux blinked, his force signature trembling ever so slightly, “I… would like a… report. On your whereabouts and activities on Srario last night. Phasma said you saw an opportunity and went to investigate, but seemed unable to provide further details.”

Investigating an opportunity? That what the kids call it these days?

He almost smirked before he caught himself, forcing his expression to stay flat, “Yes, we… uh… ran into the rebel presence in Srario last night.” Without knowing how much Phasma shared about the near bar brawl, he really needed to watch what he said about that incident.

“Yes, Phasma mentioned there was a brief altercation in the _establishment_ you were visiting.” Hux sneered, “Pity they didn't lay a hand on one of our people. We could have used that to insist that Ibaar force them to leave for violating the _neutrality_ the Ibaarians hold so dear.”

“...Right,” he nodded slowly once, trying to finish piecing his story together quickly, “so I figured they had to be staying nearby. I went to see if I could gather more information.”

Hux frowned, “And did you find out anything?”

“They’re staying at some dump of a hotel up on the high streets,” he shrugged. “Unfortunately, I couldn’t risk being seen and having them use that against the First Order. Spying would be a violation of the neutrality. I wasn’t able to do more than just survey from a distance.”

“Surely,” Hux huffed, “your probe resulted in some payoff?”

“My… probe…” he cleared his throat to hide a snort of laughter that he couldn’t keep from bubbling out. Yes, his probe had a rather nice payoff, thank you. “Um, yes, I think so. I was able to get a sense of their numbers. They are filling up two floors of the hotel they’re in. I’d estimate there’s close to a hundred of them.”

Hux huffed, shoving his mask at him. “I suppose it’s better than nothing, but what we need to know is why they’re here, what their interest is in Ibaar?”

He took his mask, shrugging, “Probably the same interests as ours. Ibaar has strategic position, is a trade hub, and has resources we want. An alliance would be beneficial.”

Scowling, Hux began to turn to walk away. He was letting out a relieved breath when the general suddenly back to face him, “One more thing, Ren…”

“Yes?” He took a deep breath, gripping the mask in his hands tightly.

“I scheduled a meeting for ten hundred hours today, I notice you failed to accept the meeting request you were commed.”

Well, this turn of the conversation managed to fill him with both relief and dread, “Ah, yes… I must have missed that meeting request.”

“Good we had this chat then, I expect to see you there.” Hux whirled again, heels clicking on the durasteel floor as he strode away.

He let out an audible groan once Hux was out of earshot. A two hour Hux meeting right before lunch. Might as well kiss his lunch hour goodbye, that bitch was sure to go long.

 

* * *

 

The meeting was already underway and the room full when he strolled in. Not surprising since he was at least twenty minutes late. On principle, he always tried to get to Hux meetings unacceptably late, just to see the look of aggravation on the man’s face.

Most of the officers eyed his mask warily as he strolled across the room to the on free chair left at the table. As with being late, he also always wore his mask, if only because it put Hux and most of the Finalizer’s officers ill at ease.

The Lieutenants on either side of of the chair tensed and looked anywhere but at him as he collapsed into it, stretching his legs out and settling in for two plus hours of utter boredom. Phasma was directly across from him, the only other person in the room with her face masked. The overhead lights reflected off her helmet as she tilted her head to him in a silent greeting, or perhaps it was less a greeting and more a gesture of commiseration for their joint suffering.

Mitaka was next to her. Like most of the other officers, Mitaka sat tensely, avoiding looking at him. But the man seemed oddly flushed and flustered looking. Still wondering why the Lieutenant was looking a little off, he saw Phasma turn her chair just enough for her leg to “accidentally” brush against Mitaka’s. Her hand shifted and he raised his eyebrows, pretty sure that her hand might also be slipping onto the man’s lap.

Well, that’s one way to fight the mind numbing boredom.

He spaced out as the meeting went on. Hux had one of the Commanders come up and present a roadmap of First Order expansion and conquest plans that was overly long and completely unrealistic. It was more of a wish list than anything that was even remotely useful, failing to take things into consideration all the messy variables of war.

Once again he let his mind wander as the man droned on and on about the different charts he was showing on the holo display. And it wandered straight to Rey, to her eyes and her smile and how her body felt so perfect against him.

Behind the general feeling of contentment he had right now was a hollow emptiness, one that as the afterglow faded would swallow him again. His world was just so empty when she wasn’t in it.

“Thank you, Commander Dreese. That was enlightening, don’t you agree Commander Ren?”

Hux saying his name drew caused him to look up sharply to see the General glaring at him.

Tilting his head slowly— that slow head tilt was just so ominous when he had his mask on, he’d spent hours perfecting it— he let a few beats of silence pass before he spoke, voice rumbling through his vocoder, “It was… interesting.”

Blowing a breath of air out his nose, Hux huffed, “Interesting? I’m glad you found—”

“Though perhaps not particularly useful,” he interrupted, smiling as Hux narrowed his eyes to glare at the visor of the mask.

“If something is interesting then it’s useful,” Hux scowled. “I don’t think—”

“I’m fairly sure,” Phasma cut in, “that something can be interesting and not be useful.”

Hux sputtered, but before he could speak one of the officers spoke, “I believe useful and interesting are mutually exclusive…” the man added quickly as Hux’s blue eyes turned towards him, “...sir.”

“I would argue something can also be useful without being interesting, and something can be interesting without being useful,” he added. There were murmurs of agreement from the room. Phasma tilted her head towards him and he could practically see her amused smile that was hidden behind her helmet. He grinned at her behind his mask.

“If something is interesting it IS useful!” Hux snapped. The room went dead silent, and every officer tensed and stared down at their hands.

Every officer but Mitaka, who shifted and cleared his throat, “I… um… watched a holovid on the evolution and upward growth of the levels of Coruscant last night.”

Raising his eyebrows, Hux turned to look at Mitaka with utter puzzlement.

Mitaka shrugged, “It was… interesting.”

Phasma turned her head to look at Mitaka, and he just knew she was looking at him fondly. “But not useful?” she asked.

Mitaka flushed as the officers burst out in laughter, shaking his head, while Hux sputtered angrily. “Not really,” Mitaka agreed, “not useful at all.”

 

* * *

 

Phasma showed up at his quarters early that night, still in her armor but with her helmet under her arm. She took the offered drink and collapsed on his couch, dropping her helmet on the cushion next to her.

“I’m meeting Dopheld later,” she raised her drink in a toast, “to do unspeakable things to him. So can’t stay too long tonight.”

“I couldn’t help but notice you appeared to be doing unspeakable things to him in the meeting this morning,” he smirked as he sat down, tipping his glass towards her in acknowledgement of her toast.

She smirked as she sipped her drink, blue eyes glittering, “Oh, _that_ ? _That_ was far from unspeakable compared to the things we do in private.”

“Ah, interesting bit of information,” he sipped his drink and smirked, “though perhaps not particularly useful. To me anyway.”

Phasma grinned, “Kylo, if I wasn’t currently content in my relationship, and if you weren’t in… in whatever this pining and random one night hook ups with an enemy qualifies as, I would be glad to show you a few of these unspeakable things I speak of.”

He froze, staring at her over his drink.

She laughed, flashing her teeth, “And I promised it would be educational and _very_ useful.”

“...Okay then,” he drained his drink and set the glass down on the end table next to his chair and grabbed the bottle to refill it.

“Casual hook ups are a great source of stress relief, especially if you’re in… a long distance relationship,” Phasma sipped her whiskey. “You might want to look into it once your current good mood fades.”

“Yeah… not really my style.”

“Pity. Have you thought about convincing the girl to switch sides? I’m fairly sure she would be welcomed with open arms by the ranks once they realized how much more tolerable you became when you get the happy fucked back into you daily.”

He choked on his sip of whiskey, coughing and setting his glass down. “Uh, I’m pretty sure she’s not going to change her mind on that.” Coughing once more, he shook his head, “And my behavior today was not that different than normal.”

Phasma gazed at him, “You threw LN-3256 into a wall last week. Destroyed three consoles in the last month, along with a few tables and chairs. Force choked an officer a few weeks ago because you didn’t like the results of their report.”

Picking his drink up again, “Your point?”

“Today, Mitaka said he heard a god awful sound and realized it was you, whistling cheerfully and that whistle being distorted horribly through your vocoder.”

“Again, your point?”

“You used the force to help CB-5698 stow the utility crates on the upper shelves in the hanger bay today.”

He sipped his drink, “And?”

“Just saying, your a bit more pleasant after getting some ass.” She tilted her head, “And sadly I think that happy Kylo is going to fade quick.”

Rolling his eyes, he set his drink down again, leaning to grab a bag from under the table, “I got you something.”

Phasma blinked, “You what?”

He pulled the bottle out of the bag, holding it out to her, “Made a stop at few stores on my way back down to the low streets. Figured I owed you one for helping me out last night.”

She took the bottle, a look of delight on her face, “Is this?”

“Vaschean rye. Well aged, should be a good one.”

“Do you know hard it to find a good bottle of this?”

“I had to go to five different shops in Srario before I found that, so yes, I do.” He picked up the bottle of Corellian whiskey to top off his glass.

“Thank you,” Phasma smiled down at the bottle, “I’ll crack it open with Dopheld tonight. He’s always a bit more adventurous once I get a few drinks into him.”

“You could have left that at the thank you,” he said dryly, taking a sip as he set the to bottle back down.

She shrugged, draining her glass of whiskey and holding it out for him to refill, which he gladly obliged. “I do appreciate the gift. I even forgive you for not letting me kill the traitor.”

“Time and place.”

The smile fell off her face, leaving a cold expression and a vicious gleam to her eyes. “Oh, there will be a time and place for FN-2187 and I. There will be.”

He was still trying to figure out something to say in response to that when his door chimed, making them both jump in surprise.

“Expecting someone?” she asked.

“No,” he got to his feet, annoyed. The only person he ever had over was Phasma, and he couldn’t imagine who would have the balls to actually come physically to his quarters instead of sending a com. Walking to the door, he used his free hand to smack the open button on the access panel, glaring at the door as it opened.

Hux stood in the hallway outside his door, sour expression on his face and looking like there were at least three sticks shoved up his ass. So normal, everyday Hux.

“Is there some reason why you felt the need to bother me in _my quarters_ , General?”

Narrowing his eyes, Hux scowled, “There have been some new developments I believe you should be informed of.”

He rolled his eyes. “There’s these things called coms…” he answered before taking a sip of his drink.

Hux’s eyes darted to the glass and his nose crinkled before looking up to meet his eyes again, “This is important, we—” Footsteps approached behind him and Hux let his voice trail off as his eyes looked over Kylo’s shoulder as Phasma walked over.

“General,” she greeted, sipping her drink.

Eyes darting between the two of them, Hux’s brow furrowed, like he was working hard to fill out a puzzle, “Captain Phasma… what are you doing… here?”

She glanced down at her glass before looking back up at Hux with mild exasperation, “Having a drink.”

“A drink,” Hux repeated, slowly.

He raised his own glass, “Yes, a drink.”

“In Ren’s quarters,” Hux still looked like he was working together some giant jigsaw puzzle.

“It’s called socializing,” he said,dryly. “Something people do when they’re off duty.”

“Off duty.” Hux once again glanced between the two of them. “The two of you, uh, _fraternize_ , while off duty.”

Why was he suddenly getting the impression that Hux was putting that jigsaw puzzle together in a way that created an entirely wrong picture?

Phasma cleared her throat, and it sounded suspiciously like she was masking a laugh.

He cleared his own throat, “You had something to tell me, General?”

Frowning, Hux looked at him again, “Yes. Right,” the general paused, “Organa is coming to Ibaar.”

Organa was… wait what?

“Excuse me?”

“You heard me. The rebels stay on Ibaar looks as if it’s being extended, and Organa will be here in a day or two. We think she intends to step up the pressure on the Ibaarian government to side with the resistance.” Hux forced his lips into a tight smile, “We will have to make sure any such endeavors fail, but perhaps this will also give us an opportunity if the security is lax enough.”

He swallowed, feeling slightly numb, “Opportunity, right.”

Hux’s eyes glittered, “I’m sure you have no problem with such a thing if it occurs?”

The resistance couldn’t be stupid enough to put Organa in danger. They couldn’t. He pulled himself together, “Of course not, though I’m doubtful they’ll let their guard down that much.”

“Perhaps not,” Hux shrugged, “or perhaps they will, we will need to be ready.”

“Is that all?”

“No.” Hux smiled again, “The Supreme Leader has decided he should also be present if Organa will be coming. The Supremacy should arrive tomorrow.”

Snoke… was coming.

Fuck.

He forced a smile, “Good news then.”

“Good news, indeed, I scheduled a meeting for nine hundred hours tomorrow to discuss this further.

“Great,” he said, flatly. “Anything else?”

“Nothing we can’t discuss tomorrow,” Hux glanced again between Phasma and him, “I’ll leave you to get back to your… fraternizing… then.” With a huff, the redhead turned on his heels and strode away down the hallway.

He let the door shut, turning and wandering back to his chair to sit down and stare at his drink. This was a lot to process. His mother was coming. Snoke was coming. It probably meant Rey was going to be here longer too. He might even wind up seeing her. But it wouldn’t be safe to get too close. Not safe at all.

Being near her and not being able to touch her. That was going to be torture.

Phasma sat back down across from him, “Are you alright, Kylo?”

“Not really sure,” he answered, draining his glass and setting it down. Staring down at his feet, he let his mind drift to a completely unrelated question, “Does Hux think we’re a thing?”

She snorted, “Oh, he thinks we’re fucking, without a doubt.” A bout of giggles escaped her, “Which is extra amusing since he had no idea at all about me and Dopheld, and we’re not particularly trying to hide it.” Setting her drink down, she stood up, “Speaking of Dopheld, he’s going to be waiting. Will you be alright?”

“I’ve got some things to process, but I’ll be fine.” He tipped two fingers at her in a salute, “Have fun.”

“Oh… I will,” she sighed, picking up her helmet and offering the same small salute back.

He watched her leave before picking up the bottle of whiskey and walking over to the viewport, taking a swig directly from the bottle. Ibaar spun peacefully below them, a calm swirl of white and grey.

Rey was down there. He sighed, placing his hand against the transparisteel. Closing his eyes, he reached out with the force, and thought he could feel her force signature ever so faintly.

Probably his imagination, but he was going to believe that he sensed her. It would make him feel like they were closer somehow. He opened his eyes and sighed.

This next week was going to be hell.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really do love this little universe. It's just cracky enough to be fun to write, and these really are two of my favorite versions of Kylo and Rey. 
> 
> Thank you all for reading and leaving kudos and commenting and doing all the things that make me want to write. Bless you.

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know why but I always liked the idea of Mitaka/Phasma. So I stuck it in here as a side ship.
> 
> I think this fic universe's version of Kylo is one of my favorite characterizations of him. Hope everyone else likes it too.
> 
> Lyrics at the beginning of the chapter are from Jason Isbell's song Hope The High Road
> 
> I also snuck a nod in to a line in Bruce Springsteen's Darkness on the Edge of Town in here, if anyone wants to play find the nod to a song lyric ;)


End file.
